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Top 3 Best Prank Phone Callers of All Time
A comedy article by John Hargrave 116,629 19
09/01/2009 06:17 PM 6557 views

The basic prank phone call is so simple that anyone can do it: call up a stranger, say something funny, then hang up. But in the hands of a master, the prank phone call can become the highest form of art, on the level of Shakespeare or Mozart, only with more swearing.

A few of these masters have even created entertainment empires around their phony phone calls: albums, TV shows, and (unfortunately) movies. Here are the top 3 all-time masters of the prank phone call.


1) The Jerky Boys. This comedy duo from Queens redefined the prank phone call during the 1990s. Former childhood friends Johnny Brennan and Kamal Ahmed spent years making bootleg tapes of their prank calls. These tapes eventually found their way to Howard Stern, who played them on his syndicated morning radio show and catapulted the pair to national stardom and a string of successful albums. The Jerky Boys have sold an estimated 8 million albums to date, though that estimate comes from their manager, so it's probably off by several million.

The Jerky Boys are known for their character-based prank phone calls, such as "Frank Rizzo," the Italian-American tough guy based on Brennan's own father:



There was also Sol Rosenberg, the timid elderly man who regularly called pharamacists, doctors, and attorneys to complain about various maladies and ailments (Brennan now uses a similar voice for the character Mort Goldman on Family Guy):



The success of The Jerky Boys culminated in the critically despised Jerky Boys: The Movie, which is interesting only because you get to see the Jerky Boys making prank phone calls to Academy Award-winning actor Alan Arkin:



The duo split up in 2000, and are no longer on speaking terms. Brennan removed all references to Ahmed on the official Jerky Boys Web site, though he did keep the name of the group. Ironically, The Jerky Boys are now just The Jerky Boy.


2) The Bum Bar Bastards. The Bastards are best known for one singular achievement: a series of prank phone calls made to Louis "Red" Deutsch, an ex-heavyweight boxer who owned the "Tube Bar" in Jersey City, NJ. These calls, known as "The Tube Bar Tapes" or "The Red Tapes," became an underground sensation as they were copied and widely circulated on cassette tape.

The basic premise of the calls was simple: the Bastards would call Red while he was tending bar, then ask Red to call loudly for a friend at the bar, using a name that was actually an embarrassing pun (like "Pepe Roni" or "Hugh Douche"). Red would usually fall for the prank, calling throughout the bar in his deep, gruff voice: "Is there a Ben Dover here? BEN DOVER?!"



Sometimes the pair would simply thank Red and hang up. When Red caught on to the prank, however, he would go into a profanity-laced tirade, with threats that were both nonsensical and disturbing, like "I'll put two z's on both cheeks of your life" and "I'll cut your belly open and show you the black stuff inside."

The Tube Bar Tapes began to make their way around college campuses and Major League Baseball teams, eventually winding up in the hands of Matt Groening, who later based this classic Simpons gag on the Tube Bar Bastards and their calls to Red:



For inspiring this classic joke, which has in turn inspired countless generations of crank callers to come, the Bum Bar Bastards deserve their place in the Prank Caller's Hall of Fame.


3) Jim Florentine. The popular comedian is best known for his characters "Special Ed" and "Bobby Fletcher" on the Comedy Central series Crank Yankers, but he is an accomplished prank caller in his own right. Florentine has released several hilarious albums of prank phone calls against unsuspecting telemarketers, entitled "Terrorizing Telemarketers."

Here's a clip from his most recent album, accompanied by fellow comedian Don Jamieson:



Florentine specializes in the "inbound prank call," where telemarketers call him, and he turns the tables. For this reason, his calls are infinitely satisfying, as these persistent telemarketers continue to read through their scripts even while he pretends to fall asleep, masturbate, or accidentally drown his grandpa.


HONORABLE MENTION: The Touch Tone Terrorists. Despite the name, this "group" is a collection of voices played by just one man, Pete Dzoghi, who has perfected not only the art but the science of prank phone calling. Dzoghi purchases 1-800 numbers that are one digit away from actual customer service numbers for companies like UPS, Jiffy Lube, and Geico. Then he answers these "wrong number" calls as if he worked for the company, using an assortment of over-the-top characters like the surly African-American "Junkyard Willie" and the stuttering hillbilly "Jim Bob."

Since these are inbound prank phone calls, made by people who are already frustrated with the company, Dzoghi is usually able to drive his callers to insanity. Take a listen to "Respect" and "Shoulda Paid" to get the general flavor.


These artists have taken the medium of prank phone calling in new and exciting directions, and will continue to inspire generations to come. One day in the early 23rd century, you'll hear the familiar inbound ringtone on your skull-implanted communication pod. You'll switch it on and hear a voice: "Is Hal Jalykakick there?"


Did we miss your favorite prank phone caller in our Top 3 list? Let us know below!

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15 Comments (Funniest: peoriagrace,R-Money,Whistler P. McManus)


Funny 1 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839782
Whistler P. McManus 141,650 23
09/01/2009 06:29 PM

Good collection, Sir. Extra credit to Jim Florentine for having had sex with Robin Quivers.

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839787
Ali 8=====D- - - -< Legend 737 5
09/01/2009 08:35 PM

A great one is where these guys call up a mcdonalds and get the workers to strip and piss on each other.

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839793
Closet Friend 3,984 5
09/01/2009 08:47 PM

Extra credit to Jim Florentine for having had sex with Robin Quivers.

I'm not feeling it...
















































Nope. Still not feeling it...

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839798
peoriagrace 5,962 9
09/01/2009 10:13 PM

Tom Mabe; telemarketer calls murder scene. #1 in my book.

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839810
Jeeni 11,047 10
09/01/2009 10:52 PM

Very nice. You learned me somethin' today. Thanks John!

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839840
I are Nipples 2,135 5
09/02/2009 12:13 AM

I absolutely love the Jerky Boys.

"I'm constantly slugging myself in the genitals."

 

Hilarious 1 votes 4.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839871
R-Money 4 4
09/02/2009 04:06 AM

Ok, so living in England I had never heard of some of these guys, bloody hillarious, however we have a dude here who stated on you tube, FONEJACKER, this guys is a genius, with a huge array of characters including a mouse, an African scammer, and Terry Tibbs the car dealer he deserves an honourable mention. Check him out!

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839891
Pubah 47,451 11
09/02/2009 05:36 AM

Jerky Boys's "Workman's Comp" call is my alltime favorite...followed by the affore mentioned Frank "I'll work circles around all you jerkys"...

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839916
mandellia 36 1
09/02/2009 02:06 PM

Florentine is my favourite! hilarious

 

Funny 2 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1839920
Count Ravos 34,412 10
09/02/2009 04:10 PM

TIP: Your comedy articles will be rated funnier if you:
-Write about funny REAL-LIFE stories, pranks, or experiments
-Write about something that HAPPENED TO YOU (stories) or something YOU MADE HAPPEN (pranks and experiments)
-Include plenty of pictures (preferably real photos of the story, but stock photos are OK)
-Write well, with correct spelling and punctuation

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1840027
carter777 16 1
09/03/2009 01:21 PM

Two words. Check out Lance Krall definitely top 5

 

Funny 1 votes 3.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1840036
Count Ravos 34,412 10
09/03/2009 03:52 PM

Two words. Check out Lance Krall definitely top 5

Well well well, if it isn't my arch nemesis...math.

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1840391
knee pop ninja 211 2
09/06/2009 04:00 AM

What? No love for Roy D Mercer? He was an original.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3J_qB7daq4

 

  0 votes 0.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1840393
cakes and ale 2,137 4
09/06/2009 04:17 AM

TwoSix words and one number. Check out Lance Krall definitely top 5

Fixed!

 

Side-splitting 2 votes 5.0 /live?func=new_user&msgid=1840442
peoriagrace 5,962 9
09/06/2009 12:59 PM

Tom Mabe; just listen...