Pubah 54,900 17
09/15/2009 06:45 PM

Kanye West choked on whatever he was smokin/drinkin at the Emmy's, then suffucated from having his nose so far up Beyonce's ass (what a way to go).

Rush Limbaugh drowned in his own sweat and vitrol.

Alex Rodriquez starved to death in the off season. He wouldnt pull himself away from the mirror he was kissing.

LaToya Jackson...to get a headline

Reverend Dave Rodriguez 2,413 0
09/15/2009 06:45 PM

3). Iggy PopThe entire Rolling Stones band.
Cause: God realized the guy has actually been clinically dead for the past 20 years and finally decides to claim him.

Mielke 1,480 5
09/15/2009 08:00 PM

TV's Webster if Gary Coleman ain't dead already.

Probably choking on Eddie Murphy's Trans-sexual sloppy seconds.

Reverend Dave Rodriguez 2,413 0
09/15/2009 08:24 PM

I refuse to play because I still have nor recouped all the money I lost on Brittany Spears.

Dr. Shempso The Heavy Metal Stooge 22,212 16
09/15/2009 10:00 PM

Don Rickles: He was old when I was 6 years old...In 1978. Cripes when is this guy gonna die?



Dick Clark: Things that make you talk funny....Things that cause you to walk with a limp....Things that can make you forget who your kids are...Oh so close, the answer of course is STROKE.



John Madden: Sooner or later he'll choke on a turkey leg or a ham sammich.

Pubah 54,900 17
09/15/2009 10:15 PM

when someone hits him in the head with a hockeypuck

Dogs Akimbo 205,285 31
09/15/2009 10:47 PM

Do you think the people two thousand years ago who had money on Jesus in the death pool and then cleaned up had to give the money back, later?

dasypy gal 12,075 15
09/15/2009 11:26 PM

Billy Graham - God will take him in his sleep

Mickey Rooney - smothered by his cheeks

Liz Taylor - will remarry and husband #9 will accidently break her back on the Honeymoon

TheVelveTurd 6,551 10
09/16/2009 08:43 AM

Tony Goldwyn: Impaled by broken glass from a shattered window.






Hey, use IMDB if you don't get it.

Mielke 1,480 5
09/16/2009 09:19 AM

AND YOUR WINING LOTTO CELEB'S ........

cycoivan 11,324 11
09/16/2009 09:47 AM

Abe Vigoda: Realizes no one has mentioned his death for a while and actually dies.

the fun in disfunctional 1,970 6
09/16/2009 09:48 AM

Jack LaLanne - ruined my life with exercise and healthy eating

Jack Kevorkian - the world is round

Fidel Castro - he's got it coming

Back-up: Efrem Zimbalist, Jr. - The FBI gave this moron a plaque because he was in a TV show a million years ago called The FBI - give me a break

Yeah, I know...I'm old

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
09/16/2009 10:43 AM

If anything happens to Iggy Pop, I'm coming after you CTD. Iggy should live forever. Keith Richards, too.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
09/16/2009 10:50 AM

Each man's death diminishes me, because I am involved with mankind.* So if I'm going to bet in a death pool, I'd prefer to bet on people whose death would diminish me the least:

Bill O'Reilly
Mel Gibson
Billy Joel


*that's John Donne, not me. I'm deep, but not that deep.

Reverend Dave Rodriguez 2,413 0
09/16/2009 10:53 AM

How could you leave out Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck and this guy?

Mielke 1,480 5
09/16/2009 12:00 PM

How could you leave out Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck and this guy?



Even with the hot cheerleaders I could only stomach one and a half minutes of that Shakespeare.....I forgot about that excuse for music.

cycoivan 11,324 11
09/16/2009 12:11 PM

How could you leave out Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck and this guy?

Jimmy Ray's cause of death will be thusly:

Random Person: Are you Jimmy Ray?
Jimmy Ray: Yes
*click* *boom*

Then a bear comes and eats the remains but pukes it back up (bears can't stomach British food either), the pile of partially eaten Jimmy Ray slowly defoliates the surrounding area until Hazmat is called in to contain it. They have to bury the remains in a secure bunker somewhere in Nevada.

dasypy gal 12,075 15
09/17/2009 12:11 AM

Henry Gibson Dead


This is getting exciting. They're dropping like flies!

Dr. Shempso The Heavy Metal Stooge 22,212 16
09/17/2009 06:35 AM

Three more...


1. Paula Abdul - Once she realizes she is out of the spot light of American Idol, her super huge ego will not be able to deal with not being payed attention to. She will continue on her way to crazy, take a right at Frosted up and commit suicide. By slitting her wrists with Penelope Cruz's face.

2. Harry Morgan - Is he even still alive?

3. Kevin James - In his next movie, he will play the bumbling, stumbling, but lovable hero. But this one will be rated R. During his love scene with Selma Hayek, his heart will explode from excitement and over-exertion, as he falls in a 300 pound mass of blubber and sweat on top of a screaming, yet turned on Selma Hayek.

Pubah 54,900 17
09/17/2009 08:13 PM

Senator Wilson's carear...Killed by the voters he misrepresents as ill-Mannered, immature, buffoons.

Oprah's Boy Toy, Steadman...of a heart attack when he found out just how hard it is to WORK for a living instead of being 'kept' by your filthy rich GIRLFRIEND.

ALL OF US...on December 12, 2012 (So Says Web-Bot and the Myans)

Pubah 54,900 17
09/20/2009 09:25 PM

So...
An Irishman, a Negro and a Blonde walk into heaven...

A B C Easy as 1 2 Lobstah 17,427 30
09/20/2009 10:19 PM

Jesus, Jesus is going to die next.

Three more times.

Pubah 54,900 17
09/20/2009 11:03 PM

Peter says to the blonde,"...

A B C Easy as 1 2 Lobstah 17,427 30
09/20/2009 11:04 PM

Tell the whole joke or STFU, Pubah. I'm sick of your schtick! We all know you're actually decently educated and have a job.

Pubah 54,900 17
09/21/2009 08:28 AM

Me thinks after nearly a year on vacation, Auntie Flow has come back to visit the Lobstah. She brought her kids P, M, and S.

Gimme Gimme Shemp Treatment 22,212 16
09/27/2009 04:39 PM

Keith Richards: Its possible that he has been dead since 1986. He could be in some kind of heroin induced zombie state. In which case he may never die.

Pubah 54,900 17
09/27/2009 09:09 PM

Thought it was "The Shroud of Tourin"


Speaking of 'Old as Moses'...

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
09/27/2009 10:33 PM

William Safire just died.

I disagreed with most of his politics, but he was, like me, a lover of the English language and a stickler for its proper use*. May his memory be a blessing.





*That is, a curmudgeonly grammar Nazi.

Pubah 54,900 17
09/27/2009 11:10 PM

I enjoyed reading his articles too...

Grammar Nazi's aren't all bad.

*Drinks a shot of Saphire Gin*

Rest in Peace, Bill

Cyco Chainsaw Massacre 11,324 11
10/14/2009 04:31 PM

Did anyone have Capt. Lou Albano in the death pool? Please come up and collect your winnings.

Of course I mostly remember him from the Mario show in the late 80's but still it makes me sad.

I will be doing the Mario in his honor tonight.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
10/14/2009 04:37 PM

Captain Lou's sister lived on my block when I was growing up. In real life, he was a very nice Sicilian-American boy. His sister was a heck of a cook, and was always trying to fatten me up (I was a very scrawny kid).

Rest in Peace, Lou. I have the scungilli is as good wherever you are.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
10/14/2009 04:37 PM

have=hope.

hairy punkin pie gal 12,075 15
11/17/2009 01:40 AM

MTV's 'Remote Control' host Ken Ober found dead at his home in California.

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
11/17/2009 08:22 AM

This is the Croaking Star Lotto, not the Who the Frost Was That Lotto.

Cyco A-Maize-ing Ivan 11,324 11
11/17/2009 04:30 PM

That sucks. I loved Remote Control, growing up as part of the MTV generation. It's too bad that Ken Ober, Colin Quinn, Denis Leary, and Adam Sandler were a lot funnier when I was 8.

Shemp loves Evil Guz 22,212 16
11/17/2009 10:39 PM

Capt. Lou is dead????

Awwwww man! I actually thought the other day that I should add him to the death lotto. Oh well too little too late.


I liked Capt. Lou when I watched wrestling when I was a kid.


Rest In Peace, rubber-band face.

Shemp loves Evil Guz 22,212 16
11/17/2009 10:45 PM

Speaking of wrastlin' and such.

I want to include Hulk Hogan on the death watch.

Hes old and run down. The 'roids have shrunking his balls, soon his heart will go too.

Plus his divorce is drainging his chceking account.

I bet he can still lick the Iron Sheik though.

Cyco A-Maize-ing Ivan 11,324 11
11/18/2009 11:59 AM

Hulk Hogan vs. Death

Hulk: WHATCHA GONNA DO BROTHA WHEN THESE PYTHONS RUN WILD ON YOU!?!?!?!

[Death touches Hulk, Hulk falls over]

Death: That's what I'm going to do, OOOOOOHHHHHH YEEAAAAAAHHHH!

Shemp loves Evil Guz 22,212 16
11/18/2009 03:28 PM

Death being voiced by Norm McDonald of course.

hairy festivus gal 12,075 15
12/16/2009 06:02 AM

What do you call two gay men named Bob?


Oral Roberts...dead at 91

WhyMi 3,545 12
12/16/2009 11:37 AM

David "I can't play real footy anymore so I'll marry some skank and move to the states to play" Beckham.

Offed by Tiger Woods during a "freak driving mishap" (no word on if the driving was in a car, cart of 3 wood)

WhyMi 3,545 12 smacks his keyboard with a large hammer
12/16/2009 11:38 AM

Damn keys always sticking....

hairy festivus gal 12,075 15
12/16/2009 11:52 AM

stop downloading so much porn, Duh.

WhyMi 3,545 12
12/16/2009 01:30 PM

It's not the downloading that causes the issue, it's the off loadin...
I mean I DON'T DOWNLOAD PORN!

Fucksock the Crusty Reindeer 1,133 3
12/16/2009 08:56 PM

Croaking star lotto; Osama bin Laden!

Whistler P. McManus 183,262 42
12/20/2009 06:42 PM

Brittany Murphy

A pretty good actress, most memorable to me for that part in the movie where she wouldn't tell the number or something? She wasn't very pretty, but you would have hit it because she had that dirty, nasty slut look that we all find so damn sexy.

Rest in Peace.