cycoivan 9,060 6
09/23/2009 05:49 PM

Gigantic Miss Coleridgeer
Sat on her rocker
eating her balls of cheese

While watching some Springer
She yelled for her hubs to bring'er
some Mountain Dew, Nigga please!

cycoivan 9,060 6
09/23/2009 05:52 PM

Mary Mary quite contrary
How does your garden grow?

BC Bud, Purple Haze
and G-13 all in a Maze

cycoivan 9,060 6
09/23/2009 06:02 PM

Humpty Dumpty sat on the stepth
Humpty Dumpty smoked some crystal meth
All the dentists, and dental technicians
Could not put Humpty's teeth togehter again

(Thank you, I'll be here all week, try the veal!)

cycoivan 9,060 6
09/23/2009 06:07 PM

Jack and Jill
when up the hill
for some slap and tickle

Jack went down
under Jill's gown
and found a big fat dickle

OK, I'm done for a while now. Awesome Challenge, Bill.

Mielke 1,438 3
09/23/2009 06:07 PM

Alice the camel toe has five John's.
Alice the camel toe has five John's.
Alice the camel toe has five John's.
So go, Alice, Ho.

Mielke 1,438 3
09/23/2009 06:09 PM

Why settle for veal when there is children in third world countries to eat.

PorterHouse Steak 444 1
09/23/2009 06:11 PM

GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.

HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.

There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad........
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.

SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pie man,
"What have you got there?"
Said the Pie man unto Simon,
"Pies, you dumbass"

TheVelveTurd 4,931 3
09/23/2009 06:13 PM

The wheels on the bus go round and round
round and round
round and round
The wheels on the bus go round and round
all through the town.

The junkies on the bus go you got a dolla?
you got a dolla?
you got a dolla?
The junkies on the bus go you got a dolla?
all through the town.

The bangers on the bus go dat's my seat bitch.
dat's my seat bitch
dat's my seat bitch
The bangers on the bus go dat's my seat bitch.
all though the town.

The hoochies on the bus go oh no you didn't
oh no you didn't
oh no you didn't
The hoochies on the bus go oh no you didn't.
All though the town.

The bums on the bus just smell like Shakespeare.
smell like Shakespeare
smell like Shakespeare
the bums on the bus just smell like Shakespeare.
all through the town.

Bill the Squirrel 25,508 8
09/23/2009 06:23 PM

There was an old woman,
Who lived in a shoe;
She had had so many men,
She had a really loose who-who.
She did her some kegels,
to tighten it more;
then went back to the corner,
Cause she was a whore.

PorterHouse Steak 444 1
09/23/2009 06:27 PM

Jack and Jill went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet,
Her clothing all tattered and torn.
It wasn't the spider that crept up beside her
But Little Boy Blue and his horn.

Bill the Squirrel 25,508 8
09/23/2009 06:30 PM

Little Jack Horner
Sat in a corner,
wacking it, watching some porn.
He stuck his thumb in his butt
And busted a nut,
And said, "I don't remember eating corn!"

cycoivan 9,060 6
09/23/2009 06:40 PM

Wee Willie Winkie runs through the town
Peeping through windows in his nightgowns
Tapping at the windows and crying through the lock
Show me your tits, so I can stroke my Coleridge!

I are Nipples 2,132 5
09/23/2009 06:40 PM

Rub a dub dub
Three men, and Whistler
In a tub.

cycoivan 9,060 6
09/23/2009 06:49 PM

Little Bo Pimp has lost his tricks
and doesn't know where to find them
Rollin' in his ride, they cannot hide
He'll use his pimp hand to find them

cycoivan 9,060 6
09/23/2009 07:11 PM

Ride a Coleridge horse to Banbury Cross
To see a fine...wait, what the frost?
What a Coleridge horse is, that knowledge I do lack
Was she riding the horse while on her back?

Bill the Squirrel 25,508 8
09/24/2009 12:06 AM

Jack Sprat could eat no fish
His wife's muff it smells like lox
So she won't give him any sex
Cause he won't munch her box

cycoivan 9,060 6
09/24/2009 01:00 AM

Sing a dirge of dementia
Granny, I gotta ask you why.
Why are all these blackbirds
in my Frost-ing pie?

Back to the home with you
cuz you're funny in the head.
It's too damn bad that we
can't just shoot you instead.

peoriagrace 5,962 9
09/24/2009 12:27 PM

Hey Diddle Diddle
Play my cat with your fiddle
You should jump up over my ass
And spank it real hard with the back of your hand
Till it's the color of my red sash


Red Rover Red Rover
Send my period right over!

Madness 1,400 5
09/25/2009 05:23 AM

Hush little baby, don't you cry, or momma's gonna drink a fifth of rye.
And when that rye gets her smashed, momma's gonna go suck Coleridges for cash.
And when all that Coleridge makes her ill, momma's gonna take a lot of pills.
And when those pills put her in a slump, momma's gonna get her stomach pumped.
When the pump is gone and all is well, momma's gonna hold up a hotel.
And when the cops come and take her away, prison will make your momma gay.

Drowning Fish 202 2
09/25/2009 10:53 AM

Jack be flaccid
Jack be quick
Jack take Viagra
For his failing dick

Miscellaneous Files 23 1
09/25/2009 02:17 PM

Hickory dickory dock
The mouse ran up the clock
The clock struck one
And three escaped with minor injuries

Bill the Squirrel 25,508 8
09/25/2009 06:23 PM

Simple Simon met a Bi man going to the fair
Said Simple Simon to the Bi man, "What have you got there?"
Said the Bi man to Simple Simon, "These would be my tittys."
Said Simple Simon to the Bi man, "Do you have a kitty?"
Said the Bi man to Simple Simon, "No, I'm a guy you Frost-ing moron!"

Drowning Fish 202 2
09/27/2009 09:02 AM

Jill be frigid
Jill be sick
So Jack pay hooker
To wet his dick

Bill the Squirrel 25,508 8
10/02/2009 05:51 PM

One blind wife
see how she's dumb
she thinks that she'll get rid of all her strife
by kicking Bill the Squirrel out of her life
In all of your life have you seen such a sight
as one blind wife.





I'm not bitter.

MungChamp 22,625 16
10/02/2009 06:29 PM

Jack and Jill went up the hill
so Jack could lick Jill's fanny.

Jack got a shock
and a mouthful of Coleridge
cos Jill's a Frost-ing tranny.

cycoivan 9,060 6
10/02/2009 10:31 PM

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe
She had 8 little children, and was on welfare too
She drinks lots of forties, and smokes rocks of crack
Would it be racist if I said she was black?

cycoivan 9,060 6
10/03/2009 07:28 PM

cyco here
sat in his chair
to think of something quick

I can't think straight
so I have to wait
to stop laughing at Mung's pic

Whistler P. McManus 141,562 23
10/04/2009 06:36 AM

Andrew Dice Clay just called from 1988. He's suing all of you.

Bill the Squirrel 25,508 8
10/04/2009 07:43 AM

Not one of these nursery rhymes is ripped off from Andrew Dice Clay. Yet!



Whistler McManus
Sat on bananas
Playing the freaking fife.
Along came a Noob
Who called him a boob
And told him to get a life

Professor Fucksock 1,080 3
10/05/2009 12:52 AM

There once was a woman named Jill,
Who used dynamite sticks for a thrill,
They found her Vagina,
In North Carolina,
And bits of her tits in Brazil..

Professor Fucksock 1,080 3
10/05/2009 12:55 AM

Mary had a little watch,
She swallowed it one day,
She tried a little castor oil to pass the time away.
The castor oil it did not work,
The time it did not pass,
So if you want to see the time -
Just look up Mary's ass..

RaisinBean 143 1
10/06/2009 06:01 PM

Mary dad a little lamb
It twas awful dumb it's true
It followed Mary in a traffic jamb
and now it's Mutton stew