Pillow Talk
A comedy article
by Lyfestyle  107  7
10/02/2009 07:49 AM 449 views
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Quick note: this dialogue alternates between me (Daniel) and the lady-friend. It's rather coarse, too, so... be warned.
That was amazing.
Yeah, I've had worse.
Seriously: I think I saw God.
You saw God?
Yeah.
Here? In my room?
Well...
Watching us bone?
Well, not literally.
Makes sense.
What makes sense?
Well, if I was God, I'd totally scope people boning.
Daniel, that's offensive.
And every time the chick said, "Oh God," I'd be like, "Yeah?"
Come on.
But they probably couldn't hear me, 'cause I'm God, and my voice can only be heard by the dead... and the not-yet-born, of course... who I also consider dead.
Please stop.
"Hey God, we've got this life-or-death situation that we need you to review."
"Give me a minute, this guy in Tallahassee is plowing three chicks at once."
"God, this is pretty important."
"Can't Moses or Jesus handle it?"
"We asked... they're watching a Mexican pony show."
"... Where in Mexico?"
Daniel... that's horrible.
Well sure, but once you've seen what God's seen, I'm sure it takes some pretty out-there stuff to get you going.
I'm speechless.
Can you imagine Saint Peter walking in on God while he's doing the business?
"God, there's this guy at the gate and he... Oh! Oh, I'm so sorry, God."
"What? Just because I'm God I don't have urges? I Frosted Mary, didn't I?"
"Well, according to the story, you didn't actually..."
"I Frosted her, Peter."
"Okay, God."
That is the most offensive thing I've ever heard.
I could, like, whisper to a guy: Watch out: she's got a burning bush.
Daniel!
Like an STD, get it?
Yes... sadly, I get it.
That's an old Teste-ment joke. It happened before the ResErection.
I'm leaving.
Jesus Christ, I'm just joking around.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
14 votes
4.5
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0 votes
0.0
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Just Ravos 63,472  21
10/02/2009 07:53 AM
Hilarious!
But you should find a girl with a sense of humour.
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Hilarious
4 votes
4.0
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Just Ravos 63,472 21
10/02/2009 07:54 AM
Actually, I lied. It isn't hilarious.
It's technically side-splitting. Technically.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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cycoivan 11,330 11
10/02/2009 02:08 PM
It's technically side-splitting. Technically
Yeah, but if he split her sides, I don't think she'd be able to keep up with her side of the conversation. But, it sounds like that could be an improvement.
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.0
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Just Ravos 63,472 21
10/02/2009 02:11 PM
Yea, but if he split her sides, he could have ribs for dinner. Everybody loves ribs!
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.7
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Snappahed 943 8
10/03/2009 12:17 AM
Fanatstic!!!! Not only were you able to get the woman to leave without arguement, you also managed to damn your soul to the firey depths of Hell!
See you there.
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0 votes
0.0
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Ali Legend 844 7
10/03/2009 06:09 AM
lulz
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0 votes
0.0
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Yuoaman 123 6
10/05/2009 11:42 AM
Oh snap!
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