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Pubah keeps toiletries in his back pack in case he needs to 'freshen up' but isn't near the river. About to sneak into a ritzy club for a night of corousing, drinking and general debachary, he decided he should brush his teeth lest he offend potential sex toys (women) with bad breath.
Digging throug his bag in a dark parking lot, he located the sample shaped tube, squeezed a bead onto his toothbrush and began brushing. Much to Pubah's dismay, a greasy, chalky taste developed where the refreshing minty foam should have...
EEEK!
...As he tried to spit it out, his tounge getting numb, Pubah realized he'd brushed his teeth with Benedryl.
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
6 votes
4.0
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.7
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Thud 53,122  10
10/26/2009 03:31 AM
At least your teeth won't be sneezing.
Wait,...
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Chuckleworthy
5 votes
2.6
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Bean 4,408 13
10/26/2009 09:24 AM
When I was young I decided to taste the "milk" that comes out of the stem when you pull a dandelion. Yeah don't try that.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Crouching Ravos, Hidden Dragon 34,394 10
10/26/2009 04:10 PM
When I was young I decided to taste the "milk" that comes out of the stem when you pull a dandelion
That certainly explains a lot about you though.
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0 votes
0.0
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Crouching Ravos, Hidden Dragon 34,394 10
10/26/2009 04:11 PM
And Pubah, we all know you carry toiletries around with you, because you are homeless and carry everything you own around with you at all times.
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Hilarious
3 votes
4.7
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Pubah, The Brain that Wouldn't Die 47,451 11
10/27/2009 04:37 AM
I've upgraded from a grocery basket to a backpack I bought, stole, found. Life is good for the Pubah.
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.0
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A.C. the Sanguisuge Frankenstein 5,980 4
10/27/2009 05:12 AM
... I decided to taste the "milk" that comes out of the stem when you pull a dandelion. Yeah don't try that.
I have more respect for Thud now. Anyone who would tolertate their other calling it a dandelion must be pretty secure.
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Funny
5 votes
3.6
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Brad Poynter 7,195 7
10/27/2009 04:53 PM
After brushing my teeth for some impending nookie with my girlfriend at the time, I decided that I would spice things up a little. So I squirreled a dab of toothpaste away like a dip of snuff and proceeded to go downtown.
Everything was cool for about 20 seconds. eoeMmmm, ohhh, mmmm, ohh, OHH, OHH, OHH MY GOD!e She nearly broke my neck with her knees as she struggled out of bed into the bathroom to try to quench the fire down below.
She made sure she kissed me first from then on.
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Hilarious
3 votes
4.3
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Bill the Zombie Squirrel 25,527 8
10/27/2009 05:29 PM
I'm waiting for Lobster to say A.C. or vice versa.
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Funny
2 votes
3.0
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Cyco Chainsaw Massacre 9,064 6
10/27/2009 05:50 PM
For those of you with kids, don't ever confuse anti-bacterial wipes with baby wipes. You'd think the kid would appreciate having a germ free turd cutter, but NOOOOOOO, they'd rather smell all nice and flowery.
Buncha wusses!
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0 votes
0.0
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A.C. the Sanguisuge Frankenstein 5,980 4
10/27/2009 06:46 PM
I really thought Bill was going to go with: Untangling the umbilical cord from around his neck while he was in the womb.
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Funny
1 votes
3.0
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A.C. with built in Horn of Plenty 5,980 4
11/12/2009 01:03 AM
Today I stuck three of my fingers in a heating vat for a pressurized hot glue gun that is kept at +355 degrees F.
Funny thing about hot glue, it doesn't come off or cool down too terribly easy. It also initiates the instinct to try to pull the source of heat off the part of your body that is getting burned, so both my hands have burns now. So far, only subcutaneous burns and blisters, but maybe I'll do better next time.
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0 votes
0.0
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Pubah In Your Pudding 47,451 11
11/18/2009 04:38 AM
I watched the Chimpanzee Face Lift lady interview during breakfast...
Took a few minutes to clean up the mess...a little longer to get rid of the smell...
...But the image of what's left of her is burned in my imagination forever!
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47,451 
11 
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