peoriagrace 6,166 11
12/16/2009 08:02 PM

I saw Mommy cut'n Santa Claus

I saw Mommy redsexing Santa Claus

New! Holiday Edition Thud! 68,517 19
12/16/2009 08:11 PM

I Saw Mommy Hiding Santa Claus (When My Daddy Came Home Early)

I saw Mommy Circumcising Santa Claus

Jingleblock 27,578 25
12/16/2009 08:12 PM

I saw mommy burning Santa Clause.

TheFoye 55,700 16
12/16/2009 08:12 PM

I saw Mommy eating Santa Claus, she's a serial killer cannibal.

Brad Poynter 36,184 48
12/16/2009 08:23 PM

I saw Mommy fisting Santa Claus

I saw Mommy stoning Santa Claus

Phuc 237,919 21
12/16/2009 08:38 PM

I saw mommy castrating Santa Claus.

Phuc 237,919 21
12/16/2009 08:39 PM

I saw Mommy blumpkining Santa Claus.

MungChamp 35,891 35
12/16/2009 08:42 PM

I Saw Mommy Shtooping Santa Claus

I Saw Mommy Pegging Santa Claus

Fucksock the Crusty Reindeer 1,133 3
12/16/2009 08:49 PM

I saw mommy performing a wounded pigeon on Santa Claus..

cakes and ale 2,404 6
12/16/2009 08:56 PM

I saw mommy manscaping Santa Claus.

Rated X-Mas Jeeni 47,809 51 puts a piece of bread in her mouth and sings
12/16/2009 09:39 PM

Eyesore balmy pissing shanty maws ~

WhyMi 3,549 12
12/17/2009 09:38 AM

I saw mommy bitching out Santa Clause.


What? Am I the ONLY ONE with those childhood memories?

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
12/17/2009 09:43 AM

Felching was my first thought, but technically, for Mommy to felch Santa Claus, there would either have to be a third party involved or else Santa Claus would have to be a much more flexible and versatile man than anyone I've heard of.

So I'm going to go with

I Saw Mommy Rimming Santa Claus.

KChiki...with bells on! 128,446 98
12/17/2009 09:48 AM

I saw mommy sexting Santa Claus.

WhyMi 3,549 12
12/17/2009 09:54 AM

Felching was my first thought, but technically, for Mommy to felch Santa Claus, there would either have to be a third party involved or else Santa Claus would have to be a much more flexible and versatile man than anyone I've heard of.


Well, he DOES often have elves with him..then their are the reindeer...and he CAN squeeze that fat ass down a chimney...so......JUST SAYIN'

Ravos the red nosed reindeer 63,472 21
12/17/2009 10:01 AM

I saw mommy dumping santa claus' body into a ditch.

Cyco 'Chuck Fristmas' Ivan 11,330 11
12/17/2009 10:05 AM

I saw mommy waiting up for Santa Claus...because he's a drunk lying two-timing no good piece of Shakespeare.

That would be the country version.

WhyMi 3,549 12
12/17/2009 10:06 AM

WOULD be?

WhyMi 3,549 12
12/17/2009 10:17 AM

'Tis the season, so lets get this outta the way right now.

somewhat safe for work.

Straw la la la la la la la la 98,023 37
12/17/2009 11:06 AM

I Saw Mommy Roasting Santa Claus...


So now there will be plenty for us 15 kids to eat!

cakes and ale 2,404 6
12/17/2009 11:17 AM

I saw mommy licking Mrs. Claus while Santa watched.

Cyco 'Chuck Fristmas' Ivan 11,330 11
12/17/2009 11:22 AM

Don't forget about the good ol' boy version

I Double Teamed Mommy With Santa Claus

Pubah's Copycat Christmas 56,851 18
12/17/2009 01:38 PM

I saw mommy stuffing Santa Clause
Underneath the Christmas tree last night

He had a red bow on his head because
on his big red butt wouldn't look right

Ghost of Chickens Past 286,634 61
12/17/2009 03:17 PM

....telling the following to SC....

A family walks up to Santa in the mall. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. Mom says to the jolly ole elf, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us."

Santa says, "Sorry, I don't think you guys qualify for the good list."

Mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us."

Santa says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."

"Take it Papa" she sez.

"First I come out, wearing a tuxedo, playing Brahms. Just as the music reaches a crescendo, my wife in her evening gown runs on stage and she undresses me before dancing provocatively on top of the piano.

Just as I finish playing the song with my Coleridge, my wife strips and does a backflip off the piano in a split on stage. Once her naked asShakespeares the floor, my 7 year old daughter and 13 year old son rush on stage juggling flaming lawn darts. My wife does a handstand and catches the lawn darts in her Carroll, she then manages to queef them out, making her the third part of this juggling act.

Ghost of Chickens Past 286,634 61
12/17/2009 03:17 PM

The queefs force her to squeeze out a few turds, which I eagerly start smearing on my naked body, which arouses me quickly. Once I'm fully aroused my daughter and son take turns blowing me while my wife straps on a monstrous dildo and begins reaming each child while i ejaculate in the eyes of my offspring.

Once I cum, I run into the audience, Shakespeare-covered body still sticky with cum and grab my parents and in-laws to involve them into the act. I strip them all nude and instruct them to start a circle jerk while screaming racial slurs. So my mother and father-in-law start screaming, "Frost the Ogden Nashes" while mutually masturbating, and my father and mother-in-law begin diddling one another and chanting, "I hate spics and jews!" Once they reach a geriatric climax, my wife uses their ejaculate to lube up her fist which she uses to start fisting me.

As my Emerson is violated, I start playing double dutch with my kids, and once they get tangled in the ropes, start a torrid 69. All the sucking and slurping cause my in-laws and parents to get aroused again and they start sodomizing and fisting one another.

My wife at this point has completely started dry-heaving, so she vomits all over my ass and my back. I line up each of my family members who take turns licking the chunks of spew off my back and out of my ass.

By now my children have to defecate so I tell them to Shakespeare in each other's favorite orifices. My son, ever the trooper takes a thick, dense Shakespeare in his sister's vagina while my daughter Shakespeares in my son's nose.

My young daughter also conveniently starts her menstrual cycle shortly thereafter, and the menses and boy-Shakespeare in her Carroll make for great lube, as each of my in-laws begin Frost-ing my daughter. My son, blinded in Shakespeare, heads back to the piano and does his best Stevie Wonder impression while my wife runs back into the audience to grab a toddler from the crowd.

Ghost of Chickens Past 286,634 61
12/17/2009 03:19 PM

I just realized this may be a violation of one of the new Zug codes, so I'm quitting there.

Santa puts them on the good list, btw.

KChiki...with bells on! 128,446 98
12/17/2009 03:23 PM

...and the baby Jesus wept.

Straw la la la la la la la la 98,023 37
12/17/2009 03:40 PM

Sounds like a rather bourgeois family, Chickens. Were they?

Ghost of Chickens Past 286,634 61
12/17/2009 03:47 PM

HARDly.

Cyco 'Chuck Fristmas' Ivan 11,330 11
12/17/2009 04:20 PM

So, what's the name of the act?

Sarah, no longer MIA 30,601 8
12/17/2009 04:28 PM

I Saw Mommy Straddling Santa Claus And I Liked It.

Pramable Lectern 80,728 42
12/17/2009 05:16 PM

I saw Mommy performing hernia surgery on Santa Clause.

Professor Nutbutter 181,311 35
12/17/2009 05:54 PM

I saw mommy touching Billy in his bathing suit area in front of Santa Clause.

Pramable Lectern 80,728 42
12/17/2009 06:11 PM

I saw Mommy playing Connect Four with Santa Clause. The adult version.

Shemp the halls, Douchebag. 22,222 17
12/17/2009 06:20 PM

I saw Mommy schtupping Hanukkah Harry.

Wait thats not right.


What? He does exist.

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
12/17/2009 06:21 PM

"That's some act, what do you call it?"

"The Advent Conspiracy!"

Shemp the halls, Douchebag. 22,222 17
12/17/2009 06:25 PM

I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus, underneath his sweaty ball sack, late last night.

Pramable Lectern 80,728 42
12/18/2009 03:59 AM

My wife does a handstand and catches the lawn darts in her Carroll

Sounds like a trap in a Saw movie.

Pramable Lectern 80,728 42
12/18/2009 01:38 PM

I saw Mommy auditing Santa Clause. Not very interesting, huh. But he was scared suitless.

Pramable Lectern 80,728 42
12/18/2009 04:28 PM

I saw mommy making a tuna noodle casserole out of Santa Clause.

Shell Belle 77,143 25
12/18/2009 05:32 PM

I saw Mommy whipping Santa Claus
She had him tied up so tight.
She was dressed all in black
I turned away but looked back
Every time I heard that whip crack.

Then I saw Mommy riding Santa Claus
Like a horse, oh what a sight.
It made him laugh and grin
Good thing Dad didn't walk in
When I saw Mommy spanking Santa Claus last night.

Straw la la la la la la la la 98,023 37
12/18/2009 06:18 PM

I Saw Mommy Jingedy Jinging Dominick the Donkey.

Pramable Lectern 80,728 42
12/19/2009 11:39 AM

I saw mommy being killed by Santa Clause. Or maybe they were just having sex, I don't know. I was only four...

Pramable Lectern 80,728 42
12/19/2009 01:26 PM

I saw mommy eating a TV tinner with my dad, who drinks and beats her except when he's dressed as a mall Santa Clause.

Welmel 51 4
12/22/2009 02:46 AM

I saw Mommy touching Santa Claus
Underneath his big black shiny belt

zuggerina~~chubby chuckle 772 9
12/30/2009 01:55 AM

I saw Rudolf Tickling The Twin Tinker Bells
That Jingle under Santas belts
Ahh OOOhhh moaned his red nose
When it antlered the woobly jells
And splattered snow from his hose

zuggerina~~chubby chuckle 772 9
12/30/2009 02:02 AM

I saw ya Mommy kissing santa claus
she puckered her ''lips'' and took the claws
Now if ya ever sneak peek ill punch ya jaws
Cos i hv squished all over this costume of santa claus

neilcm 133 7
01/11/2010 01:18 PM

I saw mommy emptying Santa's sack.

GenericGuy 284 7
01/13/2010 02:55 PM

I saw Mommy bitch-slapping Santa Claus.

Man of Men 177 7
01/14/2010 07:18 PM

I saw mommy having dinner with Santa Clause. What a nice man.

Man of Men 177 7
01/14/2010 07:46 PM

Or having sex. Whatever you find appropriate.