In this horrifying consumer report, I was trying three well-known yeast extract spreads -- Marmite, Bovril, and OXO -- and reporting on their delicate flavors and adhesive qualities [read Part 1 here]. Now it was tea time.
TEST #2: Yeast Tea
How would each yeast spread taste when made into tea? To find out, I dissolved a spoonful in hot water, gave it a good stir, then swigged it down.
Marmite
The comeback kid! Marmite's sharp flavor really did well in the tea test. It had a Sake quality to it, and while no one would like it on their first try, I could sense this was a flavor that could grow on you. Marmite earned the first 5 in this report.
OXO
OXO was fairly tepid, both in temperature and flavor. I would have liked to score OXO higher, since it did not try to kill me in the previous taste test, but its blandness did not serve as much of a chaser, which is what I really needed. OXO earned a 3.
Chilli Bovril
This had a very interesting taste. Interesting, however, does not mean good. The chilli flavor gave it a nice zing, and while I usually prefer not to throw around a word like "zing," it definitely was not bad. Chilli Bovril earned a 4.
Bovril
There was no discernible difference between Bovril and OXO in this test. Then again, my brain may have recognized it was smack-bang in the middle of a traumatic experience, and switched off non-vital functions. Since there is no way for me to prove this, Bovril earns a 3.
Cheese Marmite
Unlike its cousin, Cheese Marmite let me down once again. The extract would not dissolve, so it gave me the impression I was drinking someone's diarrhea. That said, it did not taste like diarrhea, so the points it lost were largely on a visual basis. It earned a 3.
As the last of the tea settled in my increasingly resentful stomach, a chill of fear ran down my spine as I realized what was coming next: the chip dip test.
Please continue to Part 3: Yeast Dip!
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