Ceci n'est pas une Phla 131,068 34
03/08/2010 10:13 AM

Think of it this way... Would you want money scattered all around your house, or would you want to keep all those Frost-ing useless pennies in one place?

Think about it.

Gorky Thatcher 41,132 13
03/08/2010 10:41 AM

Working with the handicapped was the first job GAB got me fired from.

Manhole 21,658 29
03/08/2010 10:42 AM

I know the feeling, well sort of. I have a few techs that are really smart but if you give them a screwdriver they'll poke their eye out.

resartus 404 9
03/08/2010 10:52 AM

if you give them a screwdriver they'll poke their eye out.

As opposed to Livers, who will poke your eye out?

Future Druggist 2,533 11
03/08/2010 11:12 AM

I read that as half a Briton

Ceci n'est pas une Phla 131,068 34
03/08/2010 11:28 AM

And are you really supervising them, or is it more like you get to be the one to pass out the milk at snack time?

Chit 178,781 15
03/08/2010 11:51 AM

And if that other Frost-ing moron tells me a machine doesn't work only for me to go out there, look at it and tell him to put gas in the engine


Awesome, Bill is actually Karl Childers from Sling Blade.

Bill Cox: [lawnmower won't start] Karl, see if you can figure out what's wrong with this. It won't crank up and everything seems to be put together right.
Karl: It ain't got no gas in it.

Dude...you are my idol. I'll share my biscuits and French fried potaters with you any day!

Ok...I'll stop now before you "plum near cut my head in two" with a dern lawnmower blade.

Chit 178,781 15
03/08/2010 12:00 PM

-Also...I think I should get SOME credit for leaving this quote out of my last post.


Frank: You ever have any brothers or sisters growing up?
Karl Childers: I had one there for a little while. But, uh, it didn't get old enough for me to play with it.

Running with Scissors 3,510 12
03/08/2010 01:04 PM

I would prefer a handicap employee over the annoying Asian that whistles all day long over here.

Dogs Akimbo 211,617 32
03/08/2010 01:51 PM

hire someone with half a brain to do both of their jobs!

By your own math, it's take a quarter of a brain to work at your company.


Now I see why you're in charge.

Dance Commander Ravos 63,472 21
03/08/2010 10:08 PM

Well Bill, you're the man for the job, obviously. Afterall, you lived with your ex-wife for years.

Irish Midgets 96,151 48
03/08/2010 11:07 PM

Bill, my father inlaw would like to talk to you about a job.

Last spring he gave me a generator that he bought 10 years ago but "the piece of Shakespeare broke down after less than ten hours". He tinkered with it and bought part after part hoping to get lucky, but alas "It was busted good". So he stuck it in the garage and bought another new one(more money than brain syndrome).

I looked it over, checked the oil and noticed it was very low. I drained it, put fresh oil in, and it started on the first pull.

I love free Shakespeare from morons!

Lorem ipsum dolor ravos amet 63,472 21
03/08/2010 11:12 PM

My dad once got a free vaccuum because the previous owners didn't realize the bag had to be changed when full.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/08/2010 11:32 PM

By your own math, it's take a quarter of a brain to work at your company.


Now I see why you're in charge.


That's it. No milk for you or Phla.

Pram 80,728 42
03/09/2010 02:08 AM

Working with the handicapped
My job, along with the thousand other things I have to do, is to teach these guys how to fix pressure washers.

Damn, it's like the blind leading the blind.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/09/2010 02:14 AM

I've not once cast dispersions on your ability to count back change and refill the soda dispenser Pram. Why? Now you've hurt my feelings.

Frozen Chickens Section 286,638 61
03/09/2010 02:31 AM

HEY! THOSE ARE MY FORMER FOSTER KIDS YOU'RE DISPARAGING!

Lorem ipsum dolor ravos amet 63,472 21
03/09/2010 02:52 AM

I read that as "former froster kids"

Gorky Thatcher 41,132 13
03/09/2010 02:53 AM

You read it correctly.

That's why they're "former".

Dogs Akimbo 211,617 32
03/09/2010 04:34 AM

That's it. No milk for you or Phla

budd mya mouf all dry frah cracka* cookie



* I don't need Cracklacka coming in here and dissing me.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/09/2010 12:02 PM

Well, I fired dipShakespeare #2 today.

This guy works on a machine today which came in because it was leaking gas from the carburator. After 2 and a half hours, he calls me and says it he can't figure it out. After I get back from all my service calls, I re-adjust the misaligned gasket in 3 minutes. I think he would be able to refill a slurpy machine though. Hey Pram, is your boss hiring?

Pram 80,728 42
03/09/2010 01:19 PM

I've not once cast dispersions on your ability to count back change and refill the soda dispenser Pram. Why? Now you've hurt my feelings.

I was just pointing out that both you and retards are like blind people with a leader- that's unity! I was speaking of the solidarity between your fine person and manchildren who can't be trusted with a mechanical pencil sharpener, and you saw negativity in that? That's your paranoia, buddy. I was giving you a compliment sandwich (not to be confused with a complimentary sandwich).

Kiss me I'm Cyco Irish 11,330 11
03/09/2010 03:33 PM

Oh my god! You work with retards? I work with retards! We should totally hang out sometime.

Just Plain Jeeni 47,815 51 looks at Bill
03/09/2010 04:04 PM

Who's the retard who hired them?

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
03/09/2010 05:48 PM

I'm lucky, I guess, because most of the people who work with me are competent. Lazy, unnecessary, disgruntled, and annoying, yes. Reeking of halitosis and b.o., yes. Irritating and just plain creepy, oh, yes. But incompetent, no, I can't really say that.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/09/2010 11:18 PM

Who's the retard who hired them?


That would be the retard before me. I mean the skilled guy who watched over the retards before me.

Pram 80,728 42
03/10/2010 01:48 AM

That deserves a coupon.



It's expired, though.

Oh Bill, there's no pleasing you!

Wokka Rokka Ravos 63,472 21
03/10/2010 02:26 AM

I think they prefer to be called handi-capable.

Fratberry 283,051 53
03/10/2010 02:55 AM

I was giving you a compliment sandwich (not to be confused with a complimentary sandwich).

Hahahaha

Just Plain Jeeni 47,815 51
03/10/2010 10:17 AM

I think they prefer to be called handi-capable.

Isn't it "differently abled"? I can never remember. The parking signs say "handicapped" so that's what I remember.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/10/2010 11:59 PM

Idiot #1 just came in and gave two weeks notice. He's going to work at the company I just left, because the guy that replaced me there quit. He said the work was too hard. Idiot #1 should love it there.

I love karma.