Lucky Charms 171,275 14
03/22/2010 07:39 PM

Ctrl F.

*Crys*

He is a good one. This is usually where I catch my huff.

Nachos 57,521 23
03/22/2010 08:31 PM

Will not let kittens or 3 year-old children with Downs syndrome drown in pools

It was looking good until you mentioned the children; now I know you're one of those tree-hugging, gaia-loving right-to-life types.

You sicken me.

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/22/2010 08:43 PM

now I know you're one of those tree-hugging, gaia-loving right-to-life types.

At first glance, I read that as "I know you're one of those tree-hugging, gay-loving right-to-fife types" and was about to kindly remind you that we already have one of those and that he's a well respected member of the community.

Whistler P. McManus 186,130 44
03/22/2010 09:30 PM

Good move calling me well-respected, but I've already adopted a n00b. Where is Chit, anyway?

Lucky Charms 171,275 14
03/22/2010 09:39 PM

Throws a dictionary at Chance

IT WAS EARLY DAMN IT!

*CRIES! CRIES! ARE YOU HAPY NOW??????

RavosComedyGod 63,472 21
03/22/2010 10:08 PM

- Fully House Trained: has been lurking for nearly two years without subscribing for an account, getting familiar with the FUQ and getting immersed in the unique Zug lore and posting etiquette. got to hang out with John Stamos and the Olsen Twins before they were legal.

Here Comes Peter Cotton TWSS 27,416 24
03/22/2010 10:16 PM

Well done Grasshoppa. You can stay. Welcome.

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/22/2010 10:19 PM

Not unless I wanted to go to the slammer Ravos. The Olsen twins could be my children. Fortunately, they are not.

Semper Fidelis Tyrannotacosaurus 61,976 36
03/22/2010 10:51 PM

I'll take this one I guess if nobody else called dibs, my last two turned out okay.

Madame KChiki 128,446 98
03/22/2010 11:00 PM

I think I adopted Brad Poynter last, but he's pretty self-sufficient.

Dude! You've got two she-gabbers that might take you!

Semper Fidelis Tyrannotacosaurus 61,976 36
03/22/2010 11:06 PM

Two totally hot she-gabbers at that.

Dogs Akimbo 211,626 32
03/22/2010 11:07 PM

I was never adopted and look how well I've turned out.












Frosters.

Spring Fresh Midgets 96,151 48
03/22/2010 11:15 PM

Donk adopted me, but after a short time he started touching me then ignoring me.

Not that I'm complaining.

Brad Poynter 36,184 48
03/22/2010 11:18 PM

Kchicki, you adopted me? I feel honored, although I am obliged to advise you that I am breast fed and alergic to formula.

MungChamp 35,891 35
03/22/2010 11:27 PM

Al adopted me early on. He lured me into his minivan with the promise of candy and Funyions. He lied! I never got either. He offered me cat and made me listen to his demo tape over and over again.

Shell O'Belle 77,143 25
03/22/2010 11:32 PM

Everytime I see your name, I immediately think, "Cum Dumpster". My apologies.


I like what you had to say, but the question is: how do you feel about women who are missing a few internal organs?

Future Druggist 2,533 11
03/22/2010 11:35 PM

No one adopted me but I'm sure I still qualify as a noob. Someone get on that will ya?

Dogs Akimbo 211,626 32
03/22/2010 11:40 PM

How soon are you going to be a druggist, and what sorts of drugs do you think you would be able to steal?

Future Druggist 2,533 11
03/22/2010 11:41 PM

5 years till I graduate. Four years till I go into rotation at the pharmacy's.

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
03/22/2010 11:48 PM

Say something funny right now and I'm sure someone will adopt you.

Future Druggist 2,533 11
03/22/2010 11:51 PM

Too much pressure.

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/22/2010 11:52 PM

Wow... I'm overwhelmed...

I'm very willing to be part of a threesome adopted by both Kchiki and Taco. I'll straighten out that rebellious boob of yours anytime Kchiki, and I'll always be there to mop up the gore everytime you rip a new Emerson to some deserving fool.

Now if you'll excuse me for a second, I got some tension to relieve in the washroom. By myself.












And a couple of boxes of Kleenex.

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/22/2010 11:53 PM

Dang!! The Emerson ripping comment was eveidently meant for Taco...

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/23/2010 12:00 AM

Oh,and Shelle, I've been called worse, don't fret. A few missing internal organs? Well, one way to see it is that it leaves more room for a Coleridge. Isn't THAT a positive outlook on the situation?

Slurpy Sammich ! 772 9 Sulks in a corner
03/23/2010 12:29 AM

Whistler P. McManus 142,099 23
03/23/2010 06:30 AM

Good move calling me well-respected, but I've already adopted a n00b. Where is Chit, anyway?




Noob-ody loves me ,not even Whistler .

Nachos 57,521 23
03/23/2010 12:42 AM

Not unless I wanted to go to the slammer Ravos. The Olsen twins could be my children. Fortunately, they are not.

That'd be a pretty Lobsterrific scenario.

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/23/2010 12:45 AM

I like you Nachos... In a terrified and submissive kind of way.

/Pram 80,728 42
03/23/2010 12:54 AM

My adoptor disappeared, along with her scary ex, so I've had to grow up alone on ZUG. This might explain why I don't know how to do HTML.

Cyco Christ died so you can sin 11,330 11
03/23/2010 01:10 AM

Couldn't you at least act like a n00b for awhile? If you already act like you've been here before why would anyone want to adopt you? Your owner will need something to rub your nose in.

Fratberry 283,051 53
03/23/2010 01:12 AM

Sorry, I have a "no strays" policy. It doesn't work but I do have it.

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/23/2010 01:14 AM

Couldn't you at least act like a n00b for awhile? If you already act like you've been here before why would anyone want to adopt you? Your owner will need something to rub your nose in.

Sorry, must be the 2 years of lurking...

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8 will try something n00bish
03/23/2010 01:17 AM

LOL!!!!!WTF!OMGBBQ!!!!11!!11

U guys r so funny =o)









Does that help my case Cyco?

Cyco Christ died so you can sin 11,330 11
03/23/2010 02:16 AM

That was spot on, and now we go to Ollie Williams with the Blaccu-weather forecast. Ollie?

WHO WANTS THIS NOOB?!

Shell O'Belle 77,143 25
03/23/2010 02:24 AM

Where is Chit, anyway?

He's been in my basement since November. I log onto his account every now and then and post as him so nobody will be suspicious.

He's getting a little lonely, so I'm looking to add to my collection. Any takers?

"Chit" 77,143 25
03/23/2010 02:29 AM

Ha ha, she's just kidding. I'm not in her basement. I'm in San Francisco, walking around town in a pair of booty shorts with a cute little backpack.

Cyco Christ died so you can sin 11,330 11
03/23/2010 02:36 AM

That's exactly what you'd expect a person imping their basement captive to say. Does he at least get to play with your Beanie Babies?

Future Druggist 2,533 11
03/23/2010 02:39 AM

So, the offer of free unlimited drugs 5 years into the future isn't enough to get me adopted? Where's Dasypy? Is it May yet?

Shelle 77,143 25
03/23/2010 02:47 AM

Does he at least get to play with your Beanie Babies?

No, but he loves my stuffed uterus.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
03/23/2010 02:54 AM

I was going to adopt, but apparently you are not allowed to prove Darwin's theory by throwing kittens and three year old with Downs Syndrome in pools.

Cyco Christ died so you can sin 11,330 11
03/23/2010 03:14 AM

No, but he loves my stuffed uterus.

This should almost be a whole new thread but what is it stuffed with? I bet that's where Bill hid his nuts.

Semper Fidelis Tyrannotacosaurus 61,976 36
03/23/2010 03:43 AM

At least the retarded kitten wouldn't have been a drain on the tax system.

Frogpop 173,153 25
03/23/2010 04:27 AM

r there no kitteh prizons!? r there no kitteh wurkhousez!?

Frogpop 173,153 25
03/23/2010 04:31 AM

if kittehs wood rather drownd thay had bettur do it and dekrees the surplus populashun!

Slurpy Sammich ! 772 9
03/23/2010 06:25 AM

Is it permissible for one N00b to adopt another N00b?






If so Waste Disposal Unit you have a taker.

Dogs Akimbo 211,626 32
03/23/2010 06:30 AM

So, the offer of free unlimited drugs 5 years into the future isn't enough to get me adopted?

I'll get back to you as soon as I've collected that 10th Get Off My Lawn trophy.

Madame KChiki 128,446 98
03/23/2010 06:31 AM

Is it permissible for one N00b to adopt another N00b?

You want to go ahead and divide by zero too while you're at it? How about bending space and time?? YOU'RE GOING TO KILL US ALL!

Dogs Akimbo 211,626 32
03/23/2010 06:48 AM

Stop sucking Kchiki's dick. The formaldehyde will give you brain damage.

Madame KChiki 128,446 98
03/23/2010 06:49 AM

I don't keep my dick in formaldehyde. I store it in Peroxide. It's nicer on the teeth.

Fratberry 283,051 53
03/23/2010 06:52 AM

MY PANTS ARE TIGHT!!11

Madame KChiki 128,446 98
03/23/2010 06:54 AM

WDU, (May I call you WDU?) your first lesson is to click me for anything that makes you stand behind me and slightly to the left.

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
03/23/2010 06:54 AM

Fatass

Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
03/23/2010 06:55 AM

That was for Frat but it can work for KChiki's post.



And I know, pot...kettle.

Shelle 77,143 25
03/23/2010 07:12 AM

Fits well under your sink, requires minimal installation time and maintenance

So is that your way of saying that, without much urging, you will get under my sink and perform sexual favors while I am standing there doing dishes and will not ask for a blowjob in return?

Waste Disposal Unit 747 8
03/23/2010 07:14 AM

Give the lady a cigar! By doing this, I augment my chances of you eventually performing the said blowjob willingly.

SHP 181,795 70
03/23/2010 07:16 AM

And for Christmas, Shell will be asking for new dishes. Plastic, please.

First Straw of Spring 98,023 37
03/23/2010 09:10 AM

The last n00b I adopted I ended up marrying, so I'm out.

Dasypygal-unwaxed 14,811 17 didn't read the thread
03/23/2010 01:03 PM

Hell, I'm not that bad but even I would't adopt MYSELF without a really large aluminum balloon containing *an alleged* 6 year old floating over the Colorado skies!


*vomits*


*wobbles*

(I think I have little glue left over. *sniff, sniff*)