Internet Pranksters Send Justin Bieber to North Korea A funny link
by Johnny Plankton 3,948 26 07/09/2010 12:50 PM 4839 views
4chan has done it again. The popular imageboard/seedy underbelly of the Web has once again f'ed with heartthrob/girl-boy Justin Bieber, in one of the most terrifically coordinated pranks we've seen.
For some reason, this picture is very popular with priests
When The Bieb held a contest on his World Tour site to vote which country he should tour next, 4chan encouraged its lunatic community to flood the elfen warbler's site with enough votes to send him to North Korea. Under that country's totalitarian Stalinist dictatorship, Bieber would perform his cat screech love songs and sub-Menudo white kid dance moves for its psychotically evil dictator. From there, Kim Jong Il (the star of Team America: World Police in puppet form) would probably torture the talent-less moptop in an unspeakable manner.
"I'm so Ronery"
If you're not an A) tweenage girl (i.e., without pubic hair), B) her parent, or C) a pedophile, you may not know that Biebopolis is the world's newest tween idol. With a bizarre Donald Trump comb-over-hair-helmet, he has managed to sell millions of records to unsuspecting sixth-grade girls who will soon be too embarrassed to admit they actually bought them.
CGI of Bieber at age 30
All in all, J-Beebs is a relatively harmless entity, whose only natural enemies appear to be good taste and 4chan, which has used its considerable fan base to torment the teen in ways that are just plain -- we can't believe we're saying this -- WRONG. While we thought the North Korea prank was funny, 4chan has been subjecting the kid to all manner of horrifying harrassment over the past year including:
1) The "Justin is Dead" campaign. (One of society's suckiest stunts. No explanation needed.)
2) The "Justin Bieber Syphilis" campaign. For this, 4chan posted the message: "Go to Google and search 'Justin Bieber Syphilis'. Let's get this to be No. 1 searched phrase on Google Trends. Use an autoclicker or macro if possible and get others involved. Unlike a death rumor, this will be hard for him to disprove."
4) The "Chuck Norris is Justin Bieber's Dad" campaign. This is funny, unless you've seen Norris's movies. Then it's just embarassing.
Chuck Norris would destroy that entire bowling alley with one roundhouse kick.
5) The "Playboy Offered Bieber's Mom $50,000 to Pose Naked" campaign. Creepy for a kid, but YUM for middle-aged comedy writers.
Mom I'd Like to Facebook
6) The "Bieber YouTube Videos Being Redirected to Porn Sites" campaign.This really is the worst. By far. It's one thing to screw with grown ups, it's another to burn an image of Long Dong Boner into the minds of sixth-graders for the rest of their lives.
Thankfully for Just Barely, not all of the pranks were cruel. The Beebster got to go to the White House Correspondents Dinner with luscious nitwit Kim Kardashian, whose publicity-starved body isn't above cradle robbing to get some face time in the media.
Beaver Boy manages to stare straight ahead, while Kardashian's nipple looks for a camera
The news wasn't so good for Kim though, as she began receiving death threats from ten-year old "Children of the Corn" girls after Beebelzebub jokingly called her "my girlfriend" in an interview. (At least we know how the syphilis rumors got started.)
But back to the original prank of sending Bieber to North Korea. Which was actually (for once) not a prank aimed at the tormented tyke, but on the lame-ass media that once again -- surprise! -- didn't verify the story with his management, before running with it. For the real story, click below.
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