Thud 68,525 19
09/20/2010 10:23 PM

Ugh...

Declan McManus Original since 2010 131,891 36
09/20/2010 10:26 PM

That's essentially what I said, too, Thud.

Jack O'CyberLantern 917 8
09/20/2010 10:32 PM

When you say "lid", I assume you meant to say "seat".

Dumbass.

Declan McManus Original since 2010 131,891 36
09/20/2010 10:36 PM

Darling, did anyone ever tell you not to Frost up a story with an excess of facts?


No?


"Never fvck up a story with an excess of facts.

Pram 80,728 42
09/20/2010 10:38 PM

and I have on a clean set of underwear, a clean t-shirt, and a few drops of Givenchy Pi.

Dude. You're supposed to take a Shakespeare, not date it.

Declan McManus Original since 2010 131,891 36
09/20/2010 10:53 PM

Believe me, this Shakespeare was more interesting than my most recent boyfriend.

The Mailman 176,467 56
09/20/2010 11:26 PM

A thread for the New Person who is obsessed with poop

If the thought of Declan's poop doesn't make him leave the site forever, nothing will.

Declan McManus Original since 2010 131,891 36
09/20/2010 11:33 PM

Je ne comprend pas, M. Le Post?


I mean, everybody else's poop stories seem to be orb bait, why not mine?


Am I considered to be so pure and virtuous that I never take a Shakespeare? Or that I never need to?

Thud 68,525 19
09/21/2010 12:17 AM

Declan, it could be that when you post a poop story it makes some people feel...



































...unclean awkward.

Drewcifer aka JackyMaille 46,366 58
09/21/2010 12:27 AM

I rather like Popantor's schtick, myself...

Chit 178,781 15
09/21/2010 12:35 AM

I rather like Popantor's schtick, myself...


So you're the one?!?

Chit 178,781 15
09/21/2010 12:45 AM

I mean, everybody else's poop stories seem to be orb bait, why not mine?


You make a strong point, Mr. Declan. A little bit of what Thud said.


I do recall laughing my ass off the time when you shared a van ride with your family from Whistler's party in NYC, back to your home to Ohio?!?

Didn't you have it coming out of more than one of your holes that day? Didn't you loose your drawers at a rest stop or something too?

Or was that George Michaels?

Thud 68,525 19
09/21/2010 01:09 AM

I rather like Popantor's schtick, myself...

Second account or just someone locked in a basement?

Declan McManus Original since 2010 131,891 36
09/21/2010 01:20 AM

Chit, I will NEVER forget THAT trip. It was to celebrate EJ's (Mrs. Whistler's) 40th birthday.


One of the other guests was the 2-3-4? year old son of one of EJ's best friends. The kid had been ill with Rotavirus. Deeply unpleasant, but not usually fatal. Everybody who stayed at EJ and Whistler's that weekend eventually got the stuff. Everybody, except, perhaps the dog.


Yes, I had it coming out both ends, on a nearly clockwork basis. Cousins Juanita and Randi were surprisingly kind, considering that they can both be (extremely) vicious bitches. I think our trip back home was extended by several hours by my frequent need to stop and use the facilities.


That set of underwear was not salvageable.


I wish the vehicle had been a van, I might have been able to lie down in the rearmost seat. It was a Mazda 323, which Cousin Juanita still has. (I was VERY careful about the upholstery.)


Thank you, I think, for making me remember one of the least delightful days of my 40s.


Incidentally, it is George Michael. George Michaels is some sort of teevee sports guy, I think. If I remember correctly, he is a different sort of pervert.

siv9939 13,642 16
09/21/2010 01:24 AM

I rather like Popantor's schtick, myself...

Popantor annoys the crap out of me.

Mr. Mike 11,439 21
09/21/2010 05:37 AM

Because

I'm a retard
I have too much time on my hands
i'm looking for a virus

my curiousity got the best of me, I visited the popinator's web site. I am very sorry I did. Either he she its really into trolling our board with its "corn laden poo" stories and went above and beyond with an accompanying site, or.......... well I just hope its that one!

Pants 14,252 17
09/21/2010 08:48 AM

GAAAWWWD DAMN YOU MIKE! GAAAWWWD DAMN YOU TO HELL!

TableTopJane 173,958 15
09/21/2010 09:04 AM

Odd. I always assumed that Declan's poop stories would include the word "santorum".

Bill the Squirrel 53,270 54
09/21/2010 09:35 AM

Let us take a look at the last 5 posts from The Poponator:

Mmmm... that guard rail is jammed in tighter than my daddie's fist up me poopie hole!

Mmmm... I would lift up that skirt and fist that poopie hole until he woke up. I think I would be able to get elbow deep!

Too small. Wouldn't produce enough bacon. I wonder if pig poopies taste like bacon? Now that would be awesome!

I would love to be in the middle of those gorillas and have an orgy! I would love to get my poopie hole ripped until it bleeds and then use the blood as lube for my other end!

Leek soup does sound good! It reminds me of runny poopies mixed in semen!

Can anyone really function in the real world with an obsession like this? Can you imagine meeting this person in line at the grocery store?

TableTopJane 173,958 15
09/21/2010 09:42 AM

This is the kind of people that John is bringing in with all his publicity? Great job there, John.

Mr. Mike 11,439 21
09/21/2010 11:03 AM

Yeah John,

THANKS POOP LOADS!

Mr. Mike 11,439 21
09/21/2010 11:06 AM

Can you imagine meeting this person in line at the grocery store?

- Ooh, you're buying a Hershey's Bar, I love to jam it in my poopie hole and mix it with my chocolate and lick it off my finger.

- Ooh you're buying corn! I love to eat corn so I can make my special corn laden poo and fist my poopie hole and re eat the corn again and again and again!

- Ooh you're buying chocolate covered pretzels.....

- Ooh you're buying a home Enema kit.....

Since lunch is cooking, I'm gonna stop now and let your minds finish those last two..... Now to throw my lunch away......

panda: eats, shoots, and leaves 181,795 70
09/21/2010 12:10 PM

I, also, out of sheer stupidity, went to this person's blog.

I'm particularly grossed out by the period blood/tampon squeezing/clot chewing...


Hold that thought. I think I just found an idea for Bill.

Pubah, Pillock of the Peephole 56,851 18
09/21/2010 12:19 PM

Nothin like a cold, wet ass in the morning...

...or so I was told by a Gay, Necropheliac.

Mr. Mike 11,439 21
09/21/2010 12:24 PM

I'm particularly grossed out by the....

OK, you obviously didn't make it down to the part about the....um.... poop blowjob, COMPLETE WITH PICTURE!

Because trust me, YEARS of therapy will not erase that AWFUL image from my mind....

turtle10 42,578 26 Goes back to the fact Declan started this
09/21/2010 12:25 PM

I guess it answers the question "does a bear Shakespeare in the woods"

Analog 9,608 19
09/21/2010 12:48 PM

- Ooh, you're buying a Hershey's Bar.....

That was funny but disturbing once I saw it only took you 3 mins time from your previous post to come up with all of those...

panda: eats, shoots, and leaves 181,795 70
09/21/2010 12:58 PM

In Mike's defense, he's read that blog. Any type of retention skills at all (and trust me, you can't unread or unsee that stuff) will enable you to recite '101 ways to turn any conversation into a conversation about eating Shakespeare and chewing blood clot gummi-bears.'

Mr. Mike 11,439 21
09/21/2010 12:58 PM

That was funny but disturbing once I saw it only took you 3 mins time from your previous post to come up with all of those...

um, I type fast?

um, I'm quck on my feet with a smartass remark?

um, I have no answer other than to hang my head in shame.....

Mr. Mike 11,439 21
09/21/2010 01:00 PM

In Mike's defense,

I love you even more now Panda. 5 orbs for defending me.

Now lets both huddle, shiver and rock in the corner due to our trauma....

Shell Belle 77,143 25
09/21/2010 01:11 PM

I'm particularly grossed out by the period blood/tampon squeezing/clot chewing

French fries dipped in ketchup seems to have been a bad choice for lunch today. I may not have seen the last of them. On the bright side, I won't have to work out.

Chix - Ahh, screw it. 286,642 61
09/21/2010 01:19 PM

Maybe this would be a good time to bring up this:

this:


and of course this for dessert:

Shemple Of the Dog 22,222 17
09/21/2010 01:23 PM

Can you imagine meeting this person in line at the grocery store?


No, but I can imagine him showing up at ZUG 16, with a box of adult diapers and a case of Ex-Lax, wearing a Shakespeare eating grin.

Dogs Akimbo 211,626 32
09/21/2010 02:56 PM

So you're the one?!?


I rather like Chit's schtick, myself...

Whistler P. McManus 186,133 44
09/21/2010 06:05 PM

Cousins Juanita and Randi were surprisingly kind, considering that they can both be (extremely) vicious bitches. I think our trip back home was extended by several hours by my frequent need to stop and use the facilities.

Behind your back they were cackling like a couple of hens and calling everyone on their cells for a little schadenfreude. Randi's getting some payback now, though - she's in the hospital for a bowel resection.


It was a Mazda 323, which Cousin Juanita still has.

You need to get out more. She's had two new cars since then. Ford Foci, to be precise. She only drives around town, though. If they go anywhere further, they take Quentin's Prius.

Declan McManus Original since 2010 131,891 36
09/21/2010 06:41 PM

I was in the car, you were not.

Or to restate that:

Potato/PotAHto.


I am well aware of Cousin Randi's procedure, I got the gang email. I'm thinking about sending her a sampler of mixed nuts while she's still in the hospital.

Thud 68,525 19
09/21/2010 06:58 PM

Send her a pineapple.

Jack O'CyberLantern 917 8
09/21/2010 08:45 PM

Send her some chocolate Ex-lax brownies.