Today, I lost it on a Political Survey-Taker
A comedy article
by TWSS is a Halloweenie  27,416  24
10/29/2010 05:55 PM 410 views
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A little background: My house phone is set up where if no one answers in 30 seconds, the call forwards to my cell phone. From 1:30-2:15PM this afternoon I was at work and my phone kept ringing and hanging up. 4 times this person called my house, and when it switched to my cell phone, he would hang up. My iPhone told me it was coming from the D.C. area. With members of my immediate family serving overseas, and somebody from D.C. calling me so many times within an hour, I was not thinking happy thoughts. Finally, at 2:30, he called again:
Me: Hello??
Nitwit On The Phone: Hi TWSS, my name is Dave and I was wondering if you had time to take a short survey..
Me: Seriously? Oh, sure, but only if you're willing to answer a question for me.
NOTP: Umm, ok...
Me: What survey in the entire world is so important that you had to call my house 5 times within the last hour?
Dave: Oh, um, well we would like to know what political issues are important to you and remind you to vote on Nov. 2 for..
Me: Ok stop right there Dave. I have a father in Iraq and a brother in Afghanistan. When I see 5 calls from the same number in the D.C. area calling me, I am not thinking positively.
NOTP: Ok I apol...
Me: Secondly, I have to see these Right-Wing Retards and DipShakespeare Democrats on TV, on signs in my neighbors yard, in my mailbox, and hear them on the radio talking about what the other guy did or didn't do, and not telling me what THEY are going to do because they know very well they're going to break every campaign promise made, and the LAST thing I want to do is have strangers calling me and endorsing these idiots. I swear the only thing you people haven't tried is skywriting- oh my God please don't start skywriting.
NOTP: (laughs nervously) No, ma'am, I don't think we're going to be doing any skywriting.
Me: Oh thank God. Look Dave, just don't call this number ever again. Although I do applaud you for volunteering at your local politician's office; looks good on college applications. With all this debt though, I hope you can find a real job after you graduate. It doesn't look good, Dave.
NOTP: Umm...
Me: Well I have to go Dave, it looks like we won't have time for that survey after all. Nice talking to you, have a great day!
*Click*
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
28 votes
4.4
/live?func=new_user&msgid=1054178241
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Funny
5 votes
3.0
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The Ancient Fifer 186,133  44
10/29/2010 11:16 PM
No, ma'am
Wait, TWSS is a chick?
Why can't I keep this straight?
First one to say, "senile dementia" gets a stern talking to.
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Funny
5 votes
3.6
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Crazyballs 784 11
10/29/2010 11:30 PM
senile dementBLAM
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.7
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KChiki - OMG I GLOW IN TEH DARK!!! 128,446 98
10/30/2010 08:01 AM
At least yours was a real person you could Frost with. I keep getting calls from DC that leave pre-recorded bullShakespeare messages on my voicemail.
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=1054178278
Closet Friend 7,665 11
10/30/2010 08:02 AM
Penile lamentPOOF!!!
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.5
/live?func=new_user&msgid=1054178279
Closet Friend 7,665 11
10/30/2010 08:06 AM
Dang. KChiki sammich FAIL...
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.0
/live?func=new_user&msgid=1054178281
Mr. Mike.....MYERS! 11,439 21
10/30/2010 08:17 AM
First one to say, "senile dementia" gets a stern talking to.
Can we reference your Erectile Disfunction?
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Chuckleworthy
4 votes
2.7
/live?func=new_user&msgid=1054178283
Strawloween 98,023 37
10/30/2010 09:38 AM
Creamy filling in an eyeball sandwich. Mmmm....halloweeny...
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Funny
4 votes
3.7
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The Scary Priestess BOO! 58,981 29
10/30/2010 11:18 AM
Last night I got a call from former President Mr. Bill Clinton himself! He told me to vote for Alex Sink and then asked me what I was wearing. After I told him about my blue dress he grunted for a few seconds and then hung up on me. I think I will vote for Mrs. Sink!
And TWSS, you rock.
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Chuckleworthy
3 votes
2.3
/live?func=new_user&msgid=1054178291
FratbOOry 283,051 53
10/30/2010 11:30 AM
KChiki is creamy. KChiki is creamy. I... um... yeah.
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.5
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TWSS is a Halloweenie 27,416 24
10/30/2010 01:57 PM
Does anybody else feel like we're just voting for the lesser of 2 evils? I liked Obama when he was campaigning. He told us what he was going to do in office, and for the most part he has tried to get much of it done. The only problem is that before he went through the budget line by line and eliminated the excess spending, he added more to it.
The 2 people running in my district are so focused on slandering the other guy's name that I have no idea what they stand for. I want to be a good American and cast my ballot, but when these idiots point fingers and stop being adults I just get so frustrated.
I think I should run. I don't know the first thing about politics, but nowadays that's probably a good thing.
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