Does anyone know anything about bunnies? A comedy conversation
by TWSS - with HOT FUDGE!! BWAHAHAHA! 27,416 24 05/09/2011 10:08 AM 412 views
I just caught my dog tossing a baby bunny around the yard. I thought it was dead, but when he pounced it with one big feet it squealed. A horrible baby bunny squeal. I managed to get it off him, and while theres no puncure wounds or any visible sign of real damage, he doesn't look that good. I have him wrapped in a towel in a box w some water.
If he doesn't make it stay tuned for the "does anyone know any good baby bunny recipes" thread.
They work much the same way kittens or puppies do. If he squeals terribly when you handle him, he might have internal injuries or broken bones. Same for if he's not very alert. If he is alert, you can try feeding him puppy formula with an animal baby bottle.
(ZUG answer)
Your dog is now confused why you took his awesome new soft chew toy away. You're a terrible mother.
Practice speaking in a bad southern accent so that in case your dog or someone else takes the bunny out of the box, you will be able to respond properly:
My mother used to raise baby squirrels and birds. Most of them lived and were released back into the woods behind our yard. We went through baby grey squirrels, flying squirrels, blue jays, etc. It can be done, but a lot of it depends on the amount of stress and injury the bunny has already sustained.
But yes, if he dies, you totally need to give him a viking funeral. If you don't, I will think considerably less of you.
He looks older, like old enough to be off formula. I think he's actually gonna be okay, he's sleeping now (I checked, he's breathing) and every once in a while the nose twitches. He didn't squeal when I was handling him, only when he was at the paws of the dog.
I just moved the towel away to see if he was still breathing again and he JOLTED awake. He's not ready to do anything yet though 'cause as soon as I put the towel back over him he closed his eyes again. He feels safe in there.
When he starts hopping around and takes a drink of water I'll release him back to the wild backyard where he'll probably be eaten by a hawk, they way it should be.
As for the viking funeral, the only body of water nearby is my swimming pool, which is still closed up for the season. My dad has something against pools and fire arrows anyway. And dead bunnies in the skimmer.
In all seriousness, you may want to wait a day or two before releasing him even if he does appear to be okay. Or you can wait a week before releasing him. That will give you enough time to build a small trebuchet to launch him into a yard down the street and away from your dog (make sure dog isn't around or he'll just fetch him and bring him back, at which point you'll just have to repeat everything all over again).
I have work soon.. who knows anything about streaming video??? At least then I can watch him nibble through the box and let himself run loose in my house.
I say all these mean things but I'm the same guy who, before I left for lunch, rescued a large black ant out of the bathroom and, using a paper towel to carry him, placed him outside on a tree.
Where he was promptly eaten by a spider. Probably. Before I put him outside I put him on the sink next to a puddle of water to see if he was thirsty. He proceeded to step into the water and then couldn't get out. So in all likelihood I rescued a retarded ant.
Bunnies aren't just cute like everybody supposes. They got them hoppy legs and twitchy little noses. And what's with all the carrots? What do they need such good eyesight for anyway?
"Little Bunny Foo Foo
hopping through the forest
Scooping up the field mice
And bopping them on the head!
Down came the Good Fairy, and she said:
"Little Bunny Foo Foo
I don't wanna see you
Scooping up the field mice
And bopping them on the head!
I will give you three chances,
Then POOF you're dog food.
So the bunny survived his first day. There was a BIG bunny sitting on the front lawn when I got home from work, his mom no doubt. HOWEVER my mom came come and bare-handed him (when I held him I always hand a glove or towel of sorts) so now her scent is all over him and I'm afraid she won't take him back.
A woman at work said her mom came into the care of a baby bunny last week and the vet had told her to mix a formula of milk and an egg yolk, so I jist tried that and he took a few eyedroppers of it and is sleeping again. He stands on his own, is alert, but WON'T friggin move from wherever you put him. Like you can make him stand on his head and he'll stay like that until you move him to another position.
I predict a few hilarious shots later in the week when he's not so terrified of me.
I woke up this morning to find the box empty. He somehow crawled out over the top and spent the night behind a trash can. It took a bit before I found him because I was looking in the closet, under the bed, under furniture; you know, REAL hiding places. So he may be a little retarded. I don't think he's fire-retarded though.
He's also younger than I thought; one eye is still closed, but he's been taking the milk-yolk mixture (albiet a bit forcefully). Still, I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much. Like Kat said, they have a poor chance of surviving without Mom, no matter how much you love him and squeeze him and call him George.
I've been calling this one "Blue" as in "Blue Buffalo" which is the brand of my dog's kibble.
My roommate had two bunnies, both adult. But I really hope that bunny isn't in a card board box. Get him in a big tall rubbermaid tub with towels in the bottom. He may be weened and that's why it's hard to feed him the mix. Hay, dark green leafy lettus, carrots as treats. When they are young they don't know to run from danger unless their mother runs first. So don't worry about him freezing in place, it's what he's supposed to do.
He's still alive, and doing really well. I dont think he was taking the formula all that well because I replace mom's nipple with a glass eyedropper, WTF? He's taking both formula and solid food (lettuce and carrots).
He's been staying in a rubbermaid container (BOX) this whole time, today I got an old guinea pig cage off of my cousin, he's in that. So suck on that Priestess and your open, warm swimming pool.
I want him off formula completely (he won't take water from the eyedropper, and he just spills whatever I leave him over his cage) and I want him a decent size before he's released. Bunnies this little are still with Mom. He just opened his second eye yesterday. He's close though.
He moves a hell of a lot more than he did when I found him, I honestly thought he was paralyzed for a while, the legs just did not work that whole first day.
I haven't seen Mom bunny since that first night. I never even saw her before that first night. I still can't find the nest. I have no idea where he came from. The dog still wants to eat him.
(Honestly I just haven't had time; work, bunny, and a dog who's super jealous of all the time you're spending with his toy. I will take some pictures this weekend, just for you.)
My dog catches two or three a year in our yard. In general, if the bunny screams, it's not a good sign. But, if there's no blood. He might recover...you never know.
Bunnies carry lots of fleas, so the best thing to do is to put him under a pinetree. If he recovers, he'll hop off. If he dies, a neighborhood cat or fox will take care of things.
On a side note, when my dog catches a rabbit, he will usually plant one quick bite on the inner thigh of the rabbit, imobilizing it. He'll then drag it to a certain spot in the yard and sit next to it while it bleeds out and dies. My dog then lays down by it and waits for me to come pick it up and bury it.
Do you keep the pool boy covered in blood as per fetish reasons or does he just come like that?
I was calling the bunny "Blue" for a while after the brand of my dog's food, but it's not sticking. "Meaty Bone" doesn't sound right either. I'm still not entirely sure if it's a boy or a girl either. So I'll take suggestions for names.
Side note: my sistet had the suggestion of calling him "Zhu-Zhu" after those annoying hamsters. Why? Because my mom had bought a bunch of them to give as Easter presents for the kids, only she left them out in reach of the puppy. I came home from work and there was a zhu-zhu pet massacre all over the living room. Innards and skins everywhere.
After the request of a viking funeral, I suggest we name it Loki because he's one of the few Norse Gods I can think of and stupid people will think you named it Lucky.
After the request of a viking funeral, I suggest we name it Loki because he's one of the few Norse Gods I can think of and stupid people will think you named it Lucky.
I had a rabbit once. He was named Thor. He scared my dog. Also...
I don't mean to be the killer of funny, but did anyone else think of bubonic plague whilst the child played with the dead squirrel???
I don't know if I thought of the plague specifically, but for the 30 seconds that I watched it I kept thinking "disease! Disease! DISEASE!!!!" When I realized that the video was over 2 minutes long, there was no way I could watch the rest.
That ugly plant is a lilly and even the water that runs through it's dirt and pools in the little catch basin under the pot is poison when animals drink it, btw.
$700 worth of vet care for Hen's yapper dog after it drank it for evidence.
At the 0:45 mark of that dead squirrel video, the cameraman totally zooms in on his wife's breasts, documenting that her nipples are erect. And NO ONE comments on that?
Was there a Eunuch Station at ZUG Boston or something?
He didn't run into the plant even though it looks that way; he ran to the dog's crate. Did I mention he may be retarded?
Thanks Shell! I couldn't let him die, at least not without trying to save him. I'll take whatever diseases he gives me with a grain of salt. And penicillin.
When he's bigger and I release him, I'll take more pictures.
I spoke too soon. He's dead. This time not a joke. I don't know WHAT happened? I took all those pictures and videos yesterday, he looks fine right? Ugh.
Excuse me now, I have to go give him a viking funeral.
Zug is messing with my head today. First the prank thread made me very very angry. And now the bunny thread is making me very very sad. This place is supposed to make me laugh, dammit.
Are you still in Ohio? I'll make you a sandwich. Though any sandwich that your brother would make would beat mine to hell and back. He doesn't have boobs though. Er, at least not the kind that most men like to look at.
Also, I suggest the name of the "Sir John Hargrave Memorial Award" be changed to "The Bunny TWSS Tried to Save Memorial Award."
Unless the dead bunneh is willing to double all donations, I think I'll keep the name. However, if someone gifts a digital or video camera, I'll be sure to mention in my award speech that it would be great to use it to post dead bunny media to the web.
if someone gifts a digital or video camera, I'll be sure to mention in my award speech that it would be great to use it to post dead bunny media to the web.
Promise to video you saying it in front of all the kids and I'll send you the one I had in boston. You know my number.
Years ago I caught my dogs taking turns violently shaking a small kitten in my back yard. It was still alive and I tried to rescue it but it died within an hour. I feel your pain.
Wow, I'm glad I finally decided to read this thread. I had no useful information so I stopped checking. Now I'm sad. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LEAVE US BUNNEH?/????/
Promise to video you saying it in front of all the kids and I'll send you the one I had in boston. You know my number.
Nuh-uh. Dead bunneh references deserve NEW electronic equipment. The kids are like, poor and stuff. I'm not gifting them a used camera. ESPECIALLY any kind that you used in Boston. I mean, I'm not risking being arrested for giving some kid naked photos of Ravos.*
I was talking to my neighbor about it and she had told me about a baby robin she had been taking care of for weeks once. When she found it, it had no feathers, and she had gotten it to the point where she was trying to teach it to fly. For no apparent reason, it died on her. So I guess when it's your time, it's your time.
It was kind of a blessing in disguise though. My dad comes home from Iraq this week and he would have killed me for "bringing that thing" in the house. Unless I promised him he could eat it when it got bigger.
The outfit in the picture looks like it may be crocheted. Maybe that's why I have it. Was I actually contemplating making something like that? What in the Frost is wrong with me?
1998 called. It wants its 200 Mbyte hard drive back.
Well, when you have about 1000 pictures that your children took of the cats and most of those are of the cats' asses as they ran away from the kids, that takes up a lot of unnecessary space.
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