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Heidi and Seal are splitting.
Here's what you have to work with:
1. Supermodel
2. Ex-Hubby is tall, ruggedly handsome African who can croon his way into pretty much anyone's pants.
3. She's probably used to a better than average penis.
You're next.
So, what chu got?
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Like This? Rate It!
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Chuckleworthy
5 votes
2.0
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Pram 80,728  42
01/24/2012 09:07 AM
A sense of humor.
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Hilarious
10 votes
4.5
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The Mailman 176,467 56
01/24/2012 09:15 AM
Ex-Hubby is tall, ruggedly handsome African who can croon his way into pretty much anyone's pants.
You have way more compliments for Seal than you do for Heidi Klum. It is obvious that you are excited about him being available.
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Funny
6 votes
3.3
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turtle - does not resolute. 42,578 26
01/24/2012 09:15 AM
So, what chu got?
No facial scars?
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Funny
2 votes
3.0
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Pram 80,728 42
01/24/2012 09:23 AM
You have any evidence on that?
Yeah. I put my Zug contest win on my resume'.
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Chickens goes down with the ship 286,647 61
01/24/2012 10:06 AM
Zug had a most lame contest? Way to go PRAM!
(Sorry, buddy. Some softballs you just have to cream.)
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Funny
2 votes
3.5
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Chickens goes down with the ship 286,647 61
01/24/2012 10:07 AM
True confession, Mailman. I do have Seal on my ipod. I do not have Heidi.
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Amusing
1 votes
1.0
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Pram 80,728 42
01/24/2012 10:27 AM
weeps for his Shakespearety accomplishments
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Chuckleworthy
2 votes
2.5
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Pram 80,728 42 has a moment of silence for the action tags that didn't make it
01/24/2012 10:29 AM
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Funny
11 votes
3.8
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Hydrant-monkey 9,888 23
01/24/2012 12:15 PM
Dear Heidi,
Tired of getting poked in the ovaries? I'm your guy!
Sincerely,
HM
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Funny
7 votes
3.3
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Spicey McHaggis 117,791 37
01/24/2012 12:38 PM
Things I have learned today:
Chickens finds Seal ruggedly handsome and contemplates the size of his penis.
Chickens likes to cream soft balls.
Conclusion:
Being dead has an affect on one's sexuality.
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Hilarious
7 votes
4.4
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Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
01/24/2012 01:06 PM
Dear Heidi,
I am not from Africa, so I don't have AIDS. Your ex is from Africa, so he probably has AIDS, which means you probably have AIDS. That explains why you are so skinny. Is Madonna going to try and adopt your half-African babies? Or does she only like full African? Well, I'm sorry you are getting divorced, mainly because you are going to give people surprise AIDS...they're going to be so happy Frost-ing a hot white chick then all the sudden...SURPRISE AIDS. And they're going to be surprised because you're white and not a meth head.
May the Lord have Mercy on your soul,
ME
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Side-splitting
2 votes
5.0
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Chickens goes down with the ship 286,647 61
01/24/2012 01:45 PM
That BIG is brilliant man when sober.
So, rarely.
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0 votes
0.0
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Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
01/24/2012 01:48 PM
Its amazing isn't it.
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Hilarious
5 votes
4.4
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Big Irish Guy 203,956 21
01/24/2012 01:56 PM
Dear Chix Daughter,
I will comfort you at your father's funeral. I will comfort you all night long. But not sexually, because it would be after your father's funeral and I will be busy having someone tattoo "I always voted Democrat" on his ass. Actually, I probably will only comfort you part of the time. I hear your mom gives a great hand job, and I usually cry afterward, so it would be awkward if we were both crying in bed. So, I probably won't comfort you, but I will buy you breakfast in the morning. Then we can have sex in an IHOP bathroom.
Hugs,
Me
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Chuckleworthy
1 votes
2.0
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Dogs Akimbo 211,630 32
01/24/2012 03:52 PM
I have way more trophies than that mother-Froster.
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