Feeble 32,400 15
10/02/2001 08:15 PM

"The Gook, The Bad, and The Ugly" is about the 3 names used to refer to Tavis.

Sleestack 30,342 13
10/02/2001 08:16 PM

"Tie Hard" - a sadomasochist's daydream.

Stanley Poodle 2,438 13
10/02/2001 08:16 PM

Forrest Hu-



*BLAM*

Stanley Poodle 2,438 13
10/02/2001 08:18 PM

Schindler's Fis-



*BLAM! BLAM!*

Feeble 32,400 15
10/02/2001 08:19 PM

"Schindler's Lust" - about a rich German's use of women from Treblinka to satisty his unnatural cravings.

Jinx 5,835 13
10/02/2001 08:19 PM

"Bling it On" = "Pootie Tang" meets "But I'm a Chearleader"



























wait...I don't get it.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/02/2001 08:20 PM

"Night Club" - about a place where people meet to have pugalistic exchanges while dancing to disco music.

Stanley Poodle 2,438 13
10/02/2001 08:20 PM

Boy Story is QTA's look int-



*BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!*

Adrian Von Buttcrack 13,341 13
10/02/2001 08:20 PM

Onal Nurses IV.



Umm, no idea. the original "plot" was good enough.

postbear 10,158 13
10/02/2001 08:21 PM

gladys night and the pigs.

Jinx 5,835 13
10/02/2001 08:22 PM

"Little Ded Riding Hood"





Ded_Freex in a little red get-up, wonders why every-one is looking at him strangely.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/02/2001 08:23 PM

The Longest Gay: The story of postbear's 7.5", thick, uncut wang.

Stanley Poodle 2,438 13
10/02/2001 08:23 PM

The African Queer is about Trixxie's construction worke-



*Thunk*

postbear 10,158 13
10/02/2001 08:25 PM

they call the wino maria



they find her in the gutter, she enchants them, and they realize she stinks and has vomit on her dress, and so keep walking.

postbear 10,158 13
10/02/2001 08:25 PM

feeble, are you hitting on me?

Stanley Poodle 2,438 13
10/02/2001 08:27 PM

Frost Soup is the story of a love triangle between Groucho and Harpo and a steamy bowl of clam chowder.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/02/2001 08:27 PM

I wouldn't hit on you with a 10", thick, uncut, pole.



"The Ted Commandments" - Mr. Turner's rules for CNN anchors.

Stanley Poodle 2,438 13
10/02/2001 08:29 PM

The Beer Hunter - Marilyn goes bar hop-



*silence*

Feeble 32,400 15
10/02/2001 08:32 PM

Ben Her - a young trassexual named Benjimin finds true love with a sensual Roman named Marcelus.

Stanley Poodle 2,438 13
10/02/2001 08:33 PM

Dancer in the Dork - Aphrodite does Werehamster in the ass with her big black penis.

postbear 10,158 13
10/02/2001 08:38 PM

apocalypse cow.



bessie travels to africa to locate colonel kurtz, relieves him of his duties, and goes insane.



the 2001 rerelease, apocalypse cow reducks gives the audience never-before screened footage of the dreaded waterfowl battalions.

Jinx 5,835 13
10/02/2001 08:40 PM

Okay, I have to admit Tavis is pretty good at this.

Jinx 5,835 13
10/02/2001 08:42 PM

"Riding in Cars with Toys": Is that a toy in your car, or are you just happy to see me?

Jinx 5,835 13
10/02/2001 08:43 PM

"She Mummy Returns": the mummy is back, and this time, it's a woman.

Jinx 5,835 13
10/02/2001 08:45 PM

"Blog": Johnny Dep sells drugs and keeps a record of it, first on bbs, latter by blog.

Jinx 5,835 13
10/02/2001 08:47 PM

"The Otters": Nicole Kidman is haunted by....otters.

Galadriel 54 12
10/02/2001 08:51 PM

"Paws" a Long Island beach town is under attack from a renegade Black Lab

Sir Edmund Fentible 490 11
10/02/2001 09:04 PM

Rat Face - The Biography of Kenshin



Rush Sour - Jackie Chan drinks sour milk.



Harry Pothead and the Sorcerer's Stone - Harry and the Sorcerer some some weed.

Id 1,116 11
10/02/2001 09:11 PM

To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Nxwmar



...wait, I suck at this game.

Id 1,116 11
10/02/2001 09:18 PM

Das Boat

CandieKohrne 8,640 15
10/02/2001 09:32 PM

Octopushy - Bond deals with a girl who won't stop calling him.



Live and Let Dig - Bond goes undercover as a coal miner.



Coldfinger - Bond develops leprosy.

Id 1,116 11
10/02/2001 09:36 PM

The Norse Whisperer.

Id 1,116 11
10/02/2001 09:49 PM

Bollock

Sir Geek 1,427 11
10/02/2001 10:15 PM

What about the infamous Flesh Gordon ?

BaronGecko 0 0
10/02/2001 11:06 PM

sadly Flesh Gordon was a series of low quality but real movies. I think they made 3.

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
10/02/2001 11:07 PM

NOW ON DVD!

Cap'n Stuby 17,826 13
10/02/2001 11:07 PM

The Princest Bride...





file under hillbilly porn

Galadriel 54 12
10/02/2001 11:09 PM

'Coleridgey' a Philadelphia man with a thick accent slaps his meat in a warehouse

Galadriel 54 12
10/02/2001 11:10 PM

that's best without the swearbot on...

PooPoo 2,710 12
10/02/2001 11:12 PM

Pain Man- story of an autistic(?) man who can tell you just where to buy all your S&M gear.

Galadriel 54 12
10/02/2001 11:17 PM

'A Bud's Life' the heartwarming (and lung-filling) story of the life and high times of a young bud.

Swollen Uvula 1,768 12
10/03/2001 12:43 AM

Schindler's Lift



... a bleak and heart-breaking tale of orthotics for war heroes.

Swollen Uvula 1,768 12
10/03/2001 12:46 AM

Schindler's Lift



... charting the rise and fall of Jewish people since 1945.

Superkitten, bisexual warrior! 3,425 0
10/03/2001 05:12 AM

Frostaman, the first movie.

Gotta Frost 'em all!







BLAM!

Zappa Krappa 1,896 12
10/03/2001 05:33 AM

Cop Gun - Tom Cruise give head to a police officer.

Zappa Krappa 1,896 12
10/03/2001 05:37 AM

Spinal Pap - Chris Guest's cervix gets tested. Turns out he contracted something from working on the sex farm.

vertical bob 26,707 13
10/03/2001 06:02 AM

M*O*S*H: Zany doctors relieve the stress of the OR by slamdancing.

vertical bob 26,707 13
10/03/2001 06:03 AM

A Clockwork Grange: Examines the ethics of behavior modification among a loose association of farmers.

vertical bob 26,707 13
10/03/2001 06:03 AM

The Perminator: He's come back in time to hunt down Sara Connor. And do her hair.

vertical bob 26,707 13
10/03/2001 06:04 AM

The French Confection: The true life story of New York undercover cop Popeye Doyle's search for the perfect pastry. Featuring the greatest dessert cart chase ever filmed!

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 07:22 AM

American Beasty: A poignant look at suburban life through the eyes of rappers.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 07:23 AM

Wild Thingy: A thingy about those girls who did that kissing thing in the watchamacallit.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 07:24 AM

A Few Goof Men: "Dumb and Dumber" go into the Marines.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 07:24 AM

The Truman Shot

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 07:26 AM

whoops, didn't finish that one:



The Truman Shot: a documentary about the differing ejaculatory styles of former Presidents.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 07:27 AM

Deliberance: Four yuppies go out canoeing, hoping to find some rednecks who will anally rape them.

Pobble 1,937 13
10/03/2001 07:44 AM

P.I.



Tom Selleck as the robot detective obsessed with circles who wants his mummy.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 08:13 AM

The Old Man and the Pea - about a nursing home inmate's frantic efforts to clean his plate before Nurse Ratched notices.

Crescent Fresh 10,666 13
10/03/2001 09:09 AM

Heh, Ron Jeremy was on WBSM last night..

Dead Robot 67,630 16
10/03/2001 09:13 AM

Blue Velveeta



A startling thriller about a college boy coming home to the steamy but yet piquant underbelly of his home town

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 09:20 AM

The Hound and The Fury - One of the three Fates takes her bassett for a walk in early 20th century Mississippi.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 09:53 AM

The Shrill is Gone - BB King sings of how peaceful it is, without his wife's nagging.

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/03/2001 10:36 AM

The World According to AARP



the story of a senior citizen who gets his weiner snapped off in a tragic wheelchair accident

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 10:38 AM

If I were voting, I'd say Chickens wins.

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/03/2001 10:39 AM

fAnnie

The story of a little orphan girl who learns to peddle her as.s....





*blam*

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 11:05 AM

The Cider Horse Rules - how young orphan boys modified a common playground basketball game.

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/03/2001 11:10 AM

Snot White and the Seven Dwarves



One woman's terrible slide into madness, manifested by her sinus infection and her collection of 7 really nasty snotrags that she insists have names.

Oscillometric Digital Blood Pressure Monitor 1,686 13
10/03/2001 12:35 PM

"The Lust World"





What happens when you combine the DNA of the QTA and Dinosaurs?! ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE!! You'll never look at a Brontosaurus neck the same way AGAIN!!!

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 02:52 PM

Planet of the Axes:

Startling sci-fi thriller where Marky Mark destroys humankind by accidentally engendering these.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 02:56 PM

Chafing Amy: A bio-documentary about Nutbutter's sex life.

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/03/2001 02:59 PM

Hee hee aushie. A clickie is yours.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:00 PM

HURRAY!! My first click!!

Pobble 1,937 13
10/03/2001 03:02 PM

Rambi: muscular young faun fights in Vietnam and befriends rabbit.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:02 PM

Last Mango in Paris: a touching comedy revolving around a fruit stand and a happy-go-lucky cancer survivor.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:03 PM

clicks for pobble!

Id 1,116 11
10/03/2001 03:05 PM

The Neverending Store, a documentary about Wal-Mart.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:05 PM

Edward Scissorglands: the tragic story of a young man coming to terms with a shocking sexual dysfunction.

Pobble 1,937 13
10/03/2001 03:05 PM

Incidentally, that wasn't your first click; I've clicked on you before, 'cos you're funny.



Nee ner.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:09 PM

Bladewunner: Harrison Ford stars as a cop with a comic speech impediment.

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 03:27 PM

The Paint



A convoluted story about a spy who uses watercolours to disguise himself as a variety of people who all look suspiciously like Val Kilmer.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:31 PM

Little Man Pat`e: Jodie Foster plays a woman who exposes a secret underworld of child cannabalism.

She-bot 909 13
10/03/2001 03:32 PM

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Fest

The story of a man and his tragic quest for an aerodynamic Port-o-let.



Magnum, R. I.

Thomas Magnum's first business plan failed miserably, so he moved from Hawaii to Rhode Island and took up knitting.



A Pion in Winter

Little known applications of theoretical particle physics in the process of politically motivated turmoil.



Where the Mild Things Are

They live in your closet, they're under the bed, Plushy Alert!

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 03:33 PM

Brainspotting



The tragic and violent story of some Scottish people who take so much drugs, their brains leak out of their ears.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:35 PM

The Maltese Falco: a tragicomedy about a musician from Malta who writes a hit song--"Cuddle Me, Rachmaninof"--only to have it ripped off by his visiting Austrian cousin. Recommended.

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 03:36 PM

Woodfellas



A story of intrigue set in the comedy world of underground carpentry.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 03:39 PM

The Jizz Singer: This little known film was actually the first porn talkie ever made!

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 03:39 PM

Titania



Or 'A Midsummer Night's Bream'



Fairies try to rescue Leonardo Di Caprio from a sinking ship, but in the end they decide he's just too bloody annoying.

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 03:42 PM

Dancer with Wolves



An adaptation of 'The Nutcracker Suite' but with wolves instead of squirrels.

Peon 6,076 13
10/03/2001 03:47 PM

Callrats: Stuart Little gets horny and goes out looking for company.



Stream 1, 2, and 3: Rather boring series of films of babbling brooks.

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 03:47 PM

Heap



Al Pacino and Robert DeNiro battle it out as two garbage collectors on opposite sides of the trash.

Peon 6,076 13
10/03/2001 03:49 PM

Jen at work: When the Vicar's alone at home, oh, the mischief he gets up to!

Dead Robot 67,630 16
10/03/2001 04:00 PM

Earth Girls are Queasy



Yeah. Jeff Goldblum makes me sick too.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 04:10 PM

Independence Gay: When QTA members move out of their parent's home.

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 04:15 PM

Lion



An old male teaches an underage cub the trade secrets of picking off defenceless humans in the big city.

Dead Robot 67,630 16
10/03/2001 04:17 PM

Tron.



Uhm...

Zach 22 11
10/03/2001 04:18 PM

Driving Miss Dairy



The complex relationship between a black farmer and his cow.

Peon 6,076 13
10/03/2001 04:35 PM

Huffa: The Big Bad Wolf swims with the fishes before he gets to puffa and blow the house down.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 06:35 PM

Blabe: Wesley Snipes in his finest role yet--a vampire pig who saves the farm by preventing Farmer Frost's "Blood Tide," an apocalyptic bacon feast. A real must see.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 06:42 PM

Clickie for Aushie.



Borro: The story of Feeble's life, in excruiating detail.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 06:42 PM

excruciating, blah.

Pobble 1,937 13
10/03/2001 07:04 PM

Gumbo. Louisianan elephant makes good.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 07:08 PM

The Modfather. Middle-aged dad gets afro, love beads, tries to convince his kids he's cool and with it.

She-bot 909 13
10/03/2001 07:18 PM

The End of Gays

Jerry Falwell's dream diary.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 07:21 PM

Apocolypse Cow. Cow of Doom (TM) returns to Gab, and destroys all the unfunny posters!



Speaking of whom, has anyone heard from the Death Bovine recently?

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 07:26 PM

postbear already did apocolypse cow.



but you both got clicks for it.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 07:27 PM

OK:



Apocolypse How: Plans for how to construct your very own atomic bomb. Comes with 5 KG of cobalt.

Pobble 1,937 13
10/03/2001 07:35 PM

Apocalypse Sow: Exploding lady pigs.

Tavis 2,438 13
10/03/2001 08:01 PM

You brits and your livestock fetishes. Honestly.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 08:04 PM

The Once and Future Ding: The Dirty Vicar, and the Codeslave rankingbot.

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
10/03/2001 08:05 PM

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dred - Hamlet in Rasta

Dirk Lately 14,001 13
10/03/2001 08:06 PM

Peeing John Malkovitch

Id 1,116 11
10/03/2001 08:11 PM

Ole Yeller: A documentary about people who yell "Ole!"



Cantact: A feature-length biography of Keanu Reeves.



Flee Willy: Willy comes back, and this time he's looking for revenge!

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 08:11 PM

The Undouchables: Some dirty rats stay that way.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 08:13 PM

ld: stop making me laugh so hard I can't breathe.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 08:13 PM

Id gets 3 clickies.



A Rave of Angels: One night, when God's out of Heaven on business, the angels throw the party of the millenium.

She-bot 909 13
10/03/2001 08:14 PM

A Midsummer's Night Cream

A cheerful frolic through the cares and woes of a skin lotion marketer.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 08:40 PM

Girth of a Nation: Squeamish goes on a moral crusade to Afghanistan, taking with him all that America holds dear: KFC, McDonalds, and Taco Bell.

Superkitten, bisexual warrior! 3,425 0
10/03/2001 08:41 PM

Night club- Brad Pitt goes to a peep show.

Superkitten, bisexual warrior! 3,425 0
10/03/2001 08:41 PM

The first rule of night club, is you do not touch the honeys!

Superkitten, bisexual warrior! 3,425 0
10/03/2001 08:42 PM

Bah. Feeble said it earlier. Goddamn.

Id 1,116 11
10/03/2001 08:56 PM

For the sake of aushie's health, I will now post only bland puns. If mirth results, cease activity and consult your physician immediately.



A Few Good Pen: The search for a nice, inexpensive pen.

Fast Action Hero: Arnold Schwarzenegger plays a track star who fights drug lords.

Hose Alone: A man wants to wash his car, but can't find the nozzle for his hose.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 08:59 PM

ld, I'm afraid it's no use. A Few Good Pen did me in.



Maybe this is not a sign of your wit as much as my witlessness.

Super_Deku 82 11
10/03/2001 08:59 PM

Hose Alone: a man who wants action, but cannot find a date.

Super_Deku 82 11
10/03/2001 09:03 PM

Silence of the Jambs: one woman's obsessive quest to quiet all the doors in her house.

Id 1,116 11
10/03/2001 09:03 PM

Well, in that case, Children of the Porn is a gritty look at AOL and the people who use it.

aushie 5,580 13
10/03/2001 09:03 PM

Home Clone: a witty film about a woman who works full time--and is a stay-at-home mom!

Feeble 32,400 15
10/03/2001 09:06 PM

Rape Fear: What Trixxie had, while in jail.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/04/2001 08:19 AM

I'd like to thank everyone who posted to this thread. It's great to reach 130 posts without a single fight!

Dead Robot 67,630 16
10/04/2001 09:07 AM

I was going to enter something as immature and asanine as "Clity of Lost Children" but I wont.

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/04/2001 01:03 PM

Apollo 12- nothing much happens. Couple of guys un-eventfully go to moon and back. Ho-hum.

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/04/2001 01:04 PM

...but it stars Val Kilmer!

Pobble 1,937 13
10/04/2001 01:25 PM

The Naked Nun.



Eww.



The Breakfast Chub.



That which Skinhead has upon waking.

aushie 5,580 13
10/04/2001 02:13 PM

Dull Metal Jacket



Exactly the same as Full Metal Jacket, but with a more honest title.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/04/2001 02:16 PM

Children of the Korn - Groupies file a class-action paternity suit against band members.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/04/2001 02:17 PM

This one's nasty, but hey, it's Gab (and I'm at school):



The Mighty Frosts - Why my wife married me.

aushie 5,580 13
10/04/2001 02:21 PM

The Full Monky:

Some down-and-out apes shake their groove thangs for extra rope swing priveleges

aushie 5,580 13
10/04/2001 02:51 PM

Apocalypso Now:



A remake of the original war classic, this time with an eerie undercurrent of steel drum music throughout.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/04/2001 02:53 PM

Citizen Dane - a story of a day in the life of a typical resident of Holland.

aushie 5,580 13
10/04/2001 02:57 PM

I hope you mean Demark!

aushie 5,580 13
10/04/2001 02:57 PM

umm. Denmark rather.

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/04/2001 03:02 PM

Sweeping Beauty- the heart ripping story of a girl who lost her broom

Just 20Chickens 286,651 61
10/04/2001 03:04 PM

Beauty and the Least- Nichole Kidmand spends the weekend with Herve Viliachez.

Princess Trixxie 65,026 15
10/04/2001 03:08 PM

The Power Muff Girls animated pre-kindegarden lesbian porn



The Power Snuff Girls, ok so it's two. animated pre-kindegarden snuff action.

Feeble 32,400 15
10/04/2001 03:13 PM

Scooby Poo - a mystery solving team consisting of a cute girl, a smart girl, a cute guy, a hippie guy, and a gigantic retarded turd.

Peon 6,076 13
10/04/2001 03:36 PM

Pity of Angels: The Anaheim Angels really feel sorry for the Mets.

Feeble's Engorged Male Ego 32,400 15
11/08/2001 12:14 PM

Had to resurrect this thread just for this one:



The Fellowship of the Ping

Faced with Sauron's evil Denial of Service attacks, a brave group of sysadmins representing the Wizard, Human, Elven, Dwarvish, and Halfling networks, band together to save the world!



Especially memorable is the scene where Gandalf the Bald destroys the Moria bridge with his Massive Networking Staff.

Sleestack 30,342 13
11/08/2001 12:37 PM

One ping to rule them all,

one ping to bind them

In the land of Redmond where the shadows lie.



-Illiad, User Friendly

Cravin Moorhead 3,307 12
11/08/2001 01:11 PM

Apacalypse Now- a movie with an all black cast.

psychaholic, now with gravy! 4,888 13
11/08/2001 01:19 PM

Armagettiton.

The Maharishi 1,098 12
12/04/2001 01:06 AM

I must save this gem of comedic genius!



Hystery Men -- a bumbling group of gynocologists save the world.



Starching for Bobby Fischer -- the story of a Jewish maid turned chess champion.



Inbreakable -- an American hacker goes insane trying to break a code with a typo.



Road Crip -- A Phat Dope Spike Lee Joint 'bout a Car Trip 'Dats Da Schizznits.

Declan McManus 131,891 36
12/04/2001 03:13 AM

Dentyl- 19th Century Jewish girl's dream of becoming a Kosher hygienist.

Declan McManus 131,891 36
12/04/2001 03:15 AM

Funny Gril- Love, heartbreak, music, and the best barbequed chicken on the lower east side

Ray Smyrank 12 11
02/08/2002 04:29 PM

This thread was actually funny, for a "theme thread" anyway.



"Luby" - about the man who skullFrosted Lee Harvey Oswald's corpse.



Eeew.