No, Karma BLOWS...but for $20 bucks it'll suck.





And you didn't notice that little Shakespeare and his Mum following you around with the squirt bottle of cleaner?

Karma isn't real because I'm not cancerriffic, but it's funny that the fat bitch fell.

And you didn't notice that little poo-poo and his Mum...



This is what we lack in the U.S. Words like "Mum." And "bloody" and "bloody Mum" didn't give me any dinner last night.

Next thing I know, I'm flat on my face, in pain and with a soggy t-shirt. Seems the cleaners had been round and had forgotten to put up a wet floor sign.



It's funny because you could sue if you were injured. The money would have helped with your grocery bill, fatty. Quick, go back and break your face. It's not like you're even attractive.

Undermeanie!! Undermeanie!

That was so unexpected I actually mouse-overed Underwhere's name expecting it to be BIG or Olly imping.

HAHAHAHAHA, I want to trim my yule log with Holly.

Catfight! Catfight!

"bloody Mum" didn't give me any dinner last night.





Well of COURSE she didn't...with you crying 'BITCH,Make me a sammich', and her being visted by "Aunt Flo" what'd you expect?

I grew up in New Yawk. Awl I was lookin faw was a cup of cawfee.

Undermeanie!! Undermeanie!

That was so unexpected I actually mouse-overed Underwhere's name expecting it to be BIG or Olly imping.



Could mean several things:

1) She's not getting any from teh Haggis (in any hole)

B) He's finally stopped shootin' blanks and the hormones are kicking in full stop

3.1345) She's gone round the bend and is drinking straight Vodka with a Vicadin chaser.

Ok, ok. I'm sorry that I was suddenly a bitch. But can we get back on topic here? A fat girl has fallen and she can't get up to reach her chocolate.

Holy Shakespeare - Undies has finally been turned to the dark side!

It's okay for Undies to make fun of Jade, both have English teeth.

I can reach my chocolate just fine, thank you very much.



ONION POO SLIVER!

<action>wanders into thread, falls over, runs out crying</action>

Next thing I know, I'm flat on my face, in pain and with a soggy t-shirt. Seems the cleaners had been round and had forgotten to put up a wet floor sign.



But that's not the worst part. Guess who was standing behind me?



That's right. The little kid and his mother. It was their turn to laugh at me







"Instant Karmas's gonna get you

Gonna knock you right on the head

You better get yourself together

Pretty soon, you're gonna be dead

What in the world you thinking of

Laughing in the face of love

What on heart you tryin' to do

It's up to you, yeah you."

It's seven hours later and my ribs are still sore. Stupid universe trying to balance itself out.

Mmmmm... ribs.

Usually, it'll bite you in the ass when you least expect it.





Could you imagine how big THAT mouth would have to be?

<action>pours DBQ sauce over her naked body and crosses her fingers</action>HAHAHAHAHA, I want to trim my yule log with Holly.



I can't believe I missed this yesterday! I hope "yule log" means 10 inch penis!

I hope by 10 inch penis you mean, "I'll be drunk and won't remember it anyway."

It's seven hours later and my ribs are still sore. Stupid universe trying to balance itself out.





Jade's so fat when she falls the universe falls off its axis?

If someone around here had a 10 inch penis I think I would know.





Call me!

Call me!



Me, or BIG? Because I do have one in a drawer.

You of course, if BIG cant see his penis what makes you think I can?

You don't have to look past my gut.

Are you trying to woo me? I think you are.



BIG wants to hump me!

So much fat in one room?



It would be like Jade.

Back off bitch! I'm desperate to get knocked up. You can have him after I'm done.

If you're looking for something bigger than a 10 in. penis why don't you just go with a fist and forearm?

Because Declan's gay.

Because BIG tastes like Smithwicks and depair. You can't get that combination just anyplace.

No, I don't...















its Smithwick's and regret.

Well, sex with me won't change that.

But at least you might get knocked up.

Up, out..it's all the same in his dictionary.

Panties, you do know that you cant get preggo having anal sex, right?

<action>Walks into thread. Slips on goo on floor. Gets concussion. Curses god that concussion can't make him forget thread. Kicks cat.</action>

At least thats what someone finally told me after many years of trying.

Sorry Cookie. I figured it was worth a try though.

But my ass is still sore you bitch.

Huh?

Karma is hilarious...



but for 10pounds, I'll suck ya Jade.



Bet it was the fist wet t-shirt contest the little nipper had ever been to.

...and the first one You'd ever won (even with a rack as nice as yours).

A whole year has gone by since I turned evil. Awesome.

Oh, you went bad long before that.

I'm so glad this thread was bumped, because I missed it the first time and I hate missing out on Jade's awesome and witty stories. I didn't like Jade. She lacked originality and was barely funny but somehow she was accepted by almost everyone other than BIG.

She sent me lots of tasty candy from England.

Gee, I hope those weren't the bits and pieces referenced in her story.

I think I might be slightly bitter because she kept promising to send me stuff but never did. Anyone wanna send me candy and Dr Pepper?

What?! I LOVE Jade. I made peanut butter pictures for her on my tits.

Shut it, Tweak! Jade is teh awesome! She was my first intercontinental stalking victim GABber pal.

Well, after Losty, that is.

Another year since I've bumped this.

I was so unexpectedly awful in this thread - I still can't believe it when I re-read it.

The worst part is that I'm fat now myself. Karma for sure.

Just more to love I say.

<action>is shocked</action>

The worst part is that I'm fat now myself

You mean, you're not fat and someone else?

Do you read your posts before you hit the submit button?

oN oviously.

I was talking to Pram you stupid chug.

didnt i juart say i don;t read the post before I send them? Ha whois stupid now!

Still you SR. Still you.

Damn right, don't ever think you an unseat me from my throne of stupidity!

I still can reach my chocolate just fine, thankyouverymuch!

I loved when Aimless said Undermeanie!! Undermeanie! Gosh I miss her.

Hey Undies, um if you fell and sued you could get some grocery money too.

Just sayin.





I LOVE YOU!

Fatty.

I love this thread.

karma karma karma karma chameleon?

You mean, you're not fat and someone else?

I never got an answer to my question.

42.

They come and go. They come and go-o-o-o.