Zug Live
Member Profile
... And that's how I know Jesus is crazy.
Member Since 2007 Current Ranking 111-
Bio:
(I think my real name is Brian, but my icon will always stay the same, so call me whatever the fuck you want. Most people remember me as RookWood for some reason, also my balls are the size of small dogs.)
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Dear (Interviewer's Name),
Thanks for your rejection letter of June 15th. After carefully considering, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your company.
This year I have been very unfortunate in receiving a vast amount of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals. Despite your company's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet with my needs at this time.
Therefore, I will initiate employment with your business immediately following graduation. I am looking forward to seeing you then. Best of luck with your future candidate rejections.
Sincerly,
Brian
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There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.
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"Qualifications?"
"Rape, arson, murder and rape."
"You said rape twice."
"I like rape."
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"Handjob from Picasso" It's the name of my band. If I had a band.
That or "Free Beer"
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From the people who brought you, "God is love. Love is blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Stevie Wonder is God."
And COMING SOON! "The devil has a tail shaped like a fork. Some dining utensils are shaped like a fork. Some dining utensils get mangled if you accidentally drop them in the garbage disposal. Therefore the devil gets mangled if you accidentally drop him in the garbage disposal."
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May the blessings of the Holy Mongoose be upon you on this joyous occasion. Sniff his sacred fur if it be not wet and feed him cheese (real stuff, not the Velveeta of corruption).
I hope you have enjoyed the wondrous bounty that the Mongoose has given you today. Be thankful and eat it, being sure to sample the mayonnaise-laden sandwiches first, for they shall soon go bad.
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Once there was this geezer called
Smithy Robinson who worked for Harry. It was rumoured that he was on
the take. Harry invited Smithy round for an explanation. Smithy didn't
do a very good job. Within a minute Harry lost his temper and reached
for the nearest thing at hand, which happened to be a fifteen-inch
black rubber cock. He then proceeded to batter poor Smithy to death with it; that was seen as a pleasant way to go . . . Hence, Hatchet
Harry is a man you pay if you owe.
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Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
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Why it it that your telephone is always stickiest on Thursday?
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Its always bugged me that flying saucers always smell like urine inside.
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I have a PHD in Parthenology.
Thanks for nothing.
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I'm not a 14 year old girl, but I play one on the internet.
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The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them. -- William Clayton
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The word "good" has many meanings. For example, If a man were to shoot his grandmother at a range of five hundred yards, I should call him a good shot, but not necessarily a good man.
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My young brother asked me what happens after we die. I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies. I guess I should have told him the truth -- That most of us go to Hell and burn eternally -- but I didn't want to upset him.
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If you can't laugh at death, you have no business killing people.
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If you call me insane again, I'll eat your other eye. -
City:
4State:
5Country:
6 -
Birthday:
07-04
ZUGZ Received and Given:
| Received: | Given: | ||
x 359
|
= 1,795ZUGZ |
x 2,516
|
= 12,580ZUGZ |
x 369
|
= 1,476ZUGZ |
x 799
|
= 3,196ZUGZ |
x 445
|
= 1,335ZUGZ |
x 107
|
= 321ZUGZ |
x 286
|
= 572ZUGZ |
x 1
|
= 2ZUGZ |
x 240
|
= 240ZUGZ |
x 1
|
= 1ZUGZ |
Total ZUGZ Received
Total ZUGZ Given
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