Il se fait des couilles en or

- He makes a lot of money

- "He is making himself golden balls"



Cette fille, c'est un thon

- This girl is very ugly

- "This girl is a tuna fish"



Il n'a jamais tremp son biscuit

- He is still a virgin

- "He has never dipped his cookie"



Il nous en chie une pendule

- He's making a big fuss about it

- "He's Shakespeare-ing a wall clock about it"



Il nous en chie une pendule treize coups

- He's making a VERY big fuss about it

- "He's Shakespeare-ing a thirteen-stroke wall clock about it"



C'est un enculeur de mouches

- He's a nitpicker

- "He buttFrosts the flies"



Il a le cul bord de nouilles

- He is extremely lucky

- "He has noodles all around his ass"

Il branle le mammouth

- He procrastinates

- "He jerks off the mammoth"



Oh, I am working that into a sentence tomorrow.

Should I be proud that I knew a few of those?

OH MY GOD. Those were Frost-ing awesome. I'm crying. My husband is crying. I don't think I've laughed that hard in a week.

Un coup de geule.



I can't even remember what it means.

Really.very.Frost-ing.funny.

Une piece de merde



A piece of Shakespeare.

Thanks, Mailman. I've been meaning to change my name back to this, but kept forgetting.

Thanks Mailman for always ringing twice for me and for those great Francais phrases that I will definitely use when I am in France and maybe to some people in the US.

Mailman, should you acquire any more French slang expressions, please please please please send them my way.

Un trous de cul



An Emerson

Yeah, when you are on your mail route in France can you also please give me some French slang.

Espece de putin





Son of a bitch

Sorry I'm Canadian, which means I meant all sorts of Quepeckers.

Sorry, meet all sorts of Quepeckers.

Le Ze Competon



Don't know how to spell in french

Flavas of "Get Lost!" in Yiddish



Gai feifen ahfen yam!

- Go peddle your fish elsewhere!



Gai platz!

- Go split your guts!



Gai shlog dein kup en vant!

- Go bang your head against the wall!



Gai shoyn, gai!

- Scram! also, Don't be silly!



Gai strasheh di vantzen!

- Go threaten the bed bugs! (You don't scare me!)



Gai tren zich!

- Have a nice day.*



Geharget zolstu veren!

- You should get killed!



Ich hob dich in bod!

- I have you in the bath house! (Go to hell!)



Me ken lecken di finger! - It's delicious!



Shtup es in toches!

- Have a nice day.*







* Actual meaning may vary with use.

The Baptist:



- une piece de merde: this expression is either a figment of your imagination, or the result of a bad Babelfish translation. It does not exist in Quebec or in France.



- un trous de cul: it is "un trou de cul" in Quebec, "un trou du cul" in France. Yes, it means "Emerson", both litterally and figuratively, just like in English.



- Espece de putin: the correct spelling is "putain", which means "whore". This expression, if I can call it that, does not mean "son of a bitch". The closest to "son of a bitch" in French is "fils de pute", which means "son of a whore".



- I meet all sorts of Quepeckers: because it's a well known fact that the inhabitants of Quebec are called "Quepeckers".



If you're gonna contribute to this thread, please post expressions that actually exist, and that have literal English translations that are somewhat funny, as opposed to straight insults. Also, spell them correctly. For instance:



Tu n'as pas invent le fil couper le beurre

- You are stupid

- "You have not invented the butter slicing wire"

Mailman runs a tight thread, dammit. Keep those posts funny, formatted, and in triads, or there'll be hell to pay! Bilingual hell!



(And no, I'm not really contributing anything; I'm just popping this past the recent flood, as it deserves front-page position. No need to buttFrost my flies over it, please.)

Mautadit tabarnac hostie!

J'ai la ququette qui colle.

I went to copy/paste one of those to my French friend on msn, but she had signed out and I accidentally said it to someone else. He said "..."



I said "sorry, wrong convo". I would have explained and he would have found it amusing, but last night he told me that there were no such things as profiles on mozilla and to try formatting my c drive. Grrr...

-Il c'est fait pter la cents

-he's not an ass virgin anymore

-he just got his penny poped



or so i've heard...

il chie de la broue

-he's lying

-brew his comming out of his ass

Royale with cheese.

I got nothin.

Syo paaska rekka nokka.

"Eat Shakespeare, snot nose."

in misspelled Finnish

Syo paaska rekka nokka.



I think you'll find it's spelled in the following way:



"Sy paska, rknokka".

Thank you pants. I knew I could count on you. My dad only taught me to say these things, not spell them.

Here, have some lasagna.

Mmm., Lasagna.



Did you ever try Mmmi, Lupe? That is a truly exotic Finnish dessert dish. The perfect food for gabbers I'd say.

I said 'ils branlent les voitures'. PLEASE tell me I didn't only say 'they jerk off cars'



I'm afraid you did. You certainly meant 'ils brûlent les voitures' (they burn cars).





Mailman, I think I love you.



You "think"? Anything I can do to make you sure of it?

McPants- not that I know of- all I remember is my dad making fillia(sp -10)that nasty snot yogurt.

McPants-translate

Lupience,



That yoghurt stuff is rather common in Sweden too. My dad eats it all the time.



I could try to make a translation of the recipe, however it only explains a very weird way of using Mmmi together with some highly questionable orange cheese spread. It involves several ingredients that could never be found in the U.S. and frankly it sounds very disgusting to me.



I'm guessing you're looking for a recipe for Mmmi and I'll see if I can find one for you.

<action>doing my best "John Wayne"...</action>



"Pard'on me, mad gazelle. Wouldjoo like a parlor vous' of mah bedware?"









(sorry, it's the best French that I have.)

Here's one.

This is a bit of a French dialect spoken around Canadian Forces Bases, especially at or near night life establishments.



You me throw coat both side road, go whole bunch!

- Would you like to fight?

I'll French fight you.

En guarde monsieur.

*pants*

punch (in French)

kick (in French)

spin (in French)

win (in French)

Ce n'est pas ma soeur, c'est un sandwich du fromage.



That's the very first complete sentence I learned in French class, 8 years ago. I am so cool. Yes, after 5 years of French, that is all I currently remember. Sigh.

Ce n'est pas ma soeur, c'est un sandwich du fromage.



"This is not my sister, it is a cheese sandwich."



Tell me, where did you learn French?

"Je fasait un tee-teeai quand la telephone a sonne."



Mailman, please tell me that translates to:

"I was peeing when the phone rang."

Mailman,



I began french classes my sophomore year of highschool. Unfortunately, I am geographically located in the middle of Spanish Speaking America. I continued through my senior year, then went on as a French Major at NMSU. There I studied for a year and a half. I soon decided that I liked drugs and alcohol better than French, so I quit school to further my new studies. Je comprends du Franais, mais most of my brain cells have disappeared.



Grosses Bises,

SB

Mailman, please tell me that translates to:

"I was peeing when the phone rang."



Yes, that is what it means, IF:

- you replace "fasait" with "faisais"

- you replace "la" with "le"

- you add the accents on the word "téléphone"

- you add an accent on the word "sonné"

- you replace "tee-teeai" (that word is not French. Cambodian perhaps?) with "pipi"

- you don't mind talking French like a little child ("je faisais un pipi" is child speak)



---



I soon decided that I liked drugs and alcohol better than French



Makes sense. Unfortunately, that wasn't an option open to me, as French is my mother tongue.

mother tongue



Isn't there a better way to say that? It makes me feel weird.

Mailman, I now have an internet crush on you. I really wish I would have stayed on top of the my French. I have some excellent reading material that I use to put me to sleep read sometimes. Like I said, I can understand enough to get me by. Plus, since Spanish and French are in the same family, I have the added benefit of knowing what people are talking about when they assume I don't understand the Spanish because I'm white. Ils sont btes.