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 Holy jumping crap, our Bigger, More Satisfying ZUG Contest has certainly swelled since we first introduced it two weeks ago. The amount of entries is growing larger and dare I say ... firmer each day, as we saw from last week's entries. Thanks to a referral from the good folks at FARK, who normally do Photoshop contests for fun, not for $500.00 in prize money, the competition is pretty heated. How heated, you ask? Let me put it this way: I'm almost completely out of dick jokes. Seriously.
For those of you without any sort of photo-editing skills, don't forget there's another $500 out there for the funniest (as determined by the ZUG Phallijoke 3000 Super Computer) MagnaRX testimonial. Give it a shot. It doesn't cost anything to enter, and if you're funny enough, you could win one half of a one thousand dollar pot of cash. I've seen the pot of cash. We stir it every so often to keep it from burning-on. It smells glorious.
We thought we should highlight a few more of the entries here as we enter the final week of the competition. Thus far there is no clear winner, just a lot of really good entries that will, unfortunately for us, make our final decision that much more difficult. We may just release some of you onto an island, hunt you for sport, and determine a winner that way.
This entry caught my eye because for some reason, the thought of old people getting it on is both repugnant and hilarious. Remember in "Cocoon" when they were all talking about how they got boners? That was pretty funny until you really thought about Wilford Brimley's chub, and I know you did. Or at least, you just did. (Submitted by Dave C.)
Heaven is awesome, but don't go swimming there. The water is freezing, apparently. This entry proves once again that God is great, God is good, God moves product in your hood. (Submitted by Rob G.)
This one is great. He could have shown a gag-ball, or a horse's bridle, but that wouldn't have made any sense. Pillows are right there, in the bedroom, so have her go ahead and bite down on one. Just do it. Good. Then tell her you farted on it beforehand, and enjoy the ride! (Submitted by Graham C.)
I used to have one of those when I was a kid. I sure had a lot of fun with it, sitting and spinning, in that order. I tried using one as an adult and I have to say, it's nowhere near as much fun. And my girlfriend at the time was not impressed either. (Submitted by William C.)
So there you have it, folks. Remember, the deadline for entries for both contests is 11:59 p.m. EST, January 25th, 2008. If you have a good sense of humor, any sort of photo-manipulation software on your computer, and approximately five minutes of free time, then you have no excuse not to enter. I mean, five hundred bucks. $500! And you won't even need to report it on this year's tax return.
(Also submitted by Dave C.)
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Like This? Rate It!
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Hilarious
5 votes
4.6
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8 Comments on "Magna Rx Challenge: The Home Stretch"
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Green Jeen 14,623  16
01/24/2008 07:50 AM
Gah! The suspense!
I think I'll take some date rape drugs to knock me out 'till you announce the winner!
Those are some good entries. The competition is [clears throat] stiff.
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0 votes
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Professor Nutbutter 152,466 14
01/24/2008 09:20 AM
I submitted an entry a week or so ago. Where is it, bee-atch.
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Professor Nutbutter 152,466 14
01/24/2008 09:21 AM
+?
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Chi Chi 160,513 12
01/24/2008 08:05 PM
You were disqualified. In the section marked "Do Not Write Here," you wrote "OK."
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Dogs Akimbo 163,020 15
01/24/2008 10:39 PM
"Magna Rx Challenge: The Home Stretch"
I've been stretching it a home for years now and let me tell you: it doesn't get any longer.
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Freckle Monster 169,584 11
01/28/2008 09:55 PM
Hey Frosters, who won?
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