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!!11!!1!!
Definition: Sign of retardation, shows writer's inability to hold down the shift
key. Usually used sarcastically following something that includes an exclamation
mark.
"Hillary Clinton is G0DZILLA!!11!!1!!"
By: Zippies Drainage
Is It 2?
Definition: Standard response to anything mathematical.
By: Dead Robot
$20
Definition: A joke based on GAB Po' Folks Auctions wherein the joker is
offering up cash for some commodity. This has become a running joke
anytime someone talks about something that could be bought or sold,
especially on the black market.
"GABber #1: My dog died. Gabber #2:
$20"
By: The Rockin' Donkey
30-minute rule
Definition: If someone gives you a ride, and they say "the thirty-minute rule is
in effect", if your trip takes longer than thirty minutes, you have to give them
oral sex. (Originally by: Kake)
By: Niles
42
Definition: The typical answer to every question on GAB. Usually when the
question involves numbers. It is a reference to
The Hitchhiker's Guide To the Galaxy where
the answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything is 42.
By: Napkin
A
AOLspeak
Definition: Just. Don't. Do. It. No what I mean? LOL OMG ELEVENTYONE!!!!@#%WER
By: Chickens
Abe Vigoda
Definition: The patron saint of GABbers.
By: Whistler P. McManus
Aroungry
Definition: (uh-rung'-re) adj. - Combination of the words "Aroused" and
"Hungry".
"Those
cherries on your breasts are making me aroungry Bob!"
By:
No_Key_Bandit
Asshat
Definition: While I am unsure of it's origins, it's a pretty standard GAB
insult.
By: Dropkick
Brody
Autoclicking
Definition: v. The practice of automatically clicking a post because the poster
is a long-standing member of the board, regardless of humor or content of the
post.
By: Feckoff
B
bark at the hole
Definition: Abbreviated version of an expression used by a Gabber's 90-year-old
grandmother who told him he could:
"Kiss my ass, and bark at the hole, and if a turd falls out, you can swallow
it whole."
By: Bankey
Bear
Definition: A large furry gay man, most likely interested in inserting his
entire fist into another bears rectum. (See: "Declan")
By: Oliver Chest
Beef Curtains
Definition: 1. (see beef flaps) the more HGN-friendly
version
By: Phuc
Beef Flaps
Definition: A promiscuous woman's Labia Minora or Majora that has been stretched
to ginormous proportions due to overuse. (See: "Trae")
By: Oliver Chest
Bitch Tits
Definition: (See: Doobs) Comes from Fight Club, where Bob
had Bitch Tits.
By: Hammerhead
BLAM!
Definition: 1. The poster uses this to acknowledge that someone will kill him
for what he said. 2. The poster uses this to show that he already knows he
is an idiot, so he'll just go ahead and finish himself off.
By: Straw
BLARRRGG!
Definition: Dead Robot's stock entry in CapCons, because 90% of the CapCons are
stupid.
By: Livewire
Blue-Footed Boobie
Definition: A small unfunny bird. Likes to build its nest from discarded
schticks.
By: Jay
BobJohnson
Definition: The alpha and omega of AWESOME.
By: Chi-Chi
Felipe
Boob Droolers
Definition: those who insisted on using the acronym SUYT to the point of
over use every time a new female joined the community. Coined when Trae
actually did SUHT and started the boob revolution.
By: TraeBoob
Revolution
Definition: What was started when Trae actually did SUHT.
By: Trae
Bonky-isms
first incarnation of the current Phla-isms. Non traditional, often not
understood postings.
By: Trae
Brad Nails
Definition: This makes no
sense whatsoever. Really. It's a palindril.
By: Chickens
Bump
Definition: v. To post in an old thread, in order to put it back on the front
page of GAB.
"Who's the twatwaffle who bumped Squeamish's invisible thread again?"
By: Mailman
Buttrock
Definition: Music made by 80's metal bands such as Slaughter, Winger, Whitesnake
and Def Leppard
By: The Rockin' Donkey
C
Capcon
Definition: Caption Contest. A thread consisting of a picture, followed by
attempts made by GABbers to find a fitting, but funny, caption. Usually started
by Chi-Chi, usually attracts a plethora of n00bs.
"Please
change the front page capcon, it has been up for too long"
By: Mailman
Chesticles
Definition: n. boobage; female mammary glands; knockers; magumbos; bodacious
tatas; mommybags. In other words, breasts.
By: Phuc
"Chickens is dead?"
Definition: A callback to a
prank Chickens played on GAB where he posted as his wife, claiming that he
had been killed in a freak car accident.
By: The Rockin' Donkey
clickie
Definition: n. the happy smiley face next to the
post that you click when
another GABber's post makes you chuckle, laugh, or shoot milk out your nose.
By: Erika (updated)
Clickie Whore
Definition: n. One who will do anything for a clickie, including but not
limited to the following: groveling, pleading, taking cheap shots, plagiarizing,
hazing n00bs, stroking old GABbers' egos, using clichés, creating false
identities, performing embarrassing acts and showing of tits.
By: Lamburger
Clovis
Definition: A relatively harmless but utterly clueless noob who worked for a gas
station somewhere below the Mason Dixon line. He was chased off in a short
time, but an embittered former Gabber assumed his identity and launched script
attacks on the board, throwing it into a state of general chaos. That is,
more chaos than usual. The impostor Clovis (a.k.a Clovis-clone) was banned
and/or lost interest. (After this, Livewire wrote a poem about these events,
found here)
By: Livewire
codeslave
Definition: He did... something. I'm not sure what. This needs a better entry.
After a private feud, he left to make HOB.
By: Napkin
Comedy. Gold
Definition: Description of something SO side-achingly, can't get a breath funny,
it deserves gold status.
By: Dropkick Brody
Computer Stew a.k.a
"Stew"
Definition: n. A ZUG spin-off. A daily 5-minute Web show that ran for more than
300 episodes, breaking new ground and pushing the envelope. Was
eventually killed by a short-sighted corporation that couldn't see its own
impending dotcom doom.
By: Phuc
Cromulent
Definition: Acceptable, but not really.
"(n00b's name here) has a perfectly cromulent opinion regarding the direction
of ZUG."
By: Phuc
Crotchrot
Definition: n. Genital decomposition disorder (GDD). Something one usually
wishes to infect another with upon receiving a Maha.
By: Duuuuh
D
dead baby jokes
Definition: Another GAB staple. If done right can be very funny (see
Ollie's funniest post).
By: Dropkick Brody
Delicious
Definition: Always italicised, it can precede pretty much any word to turn it
into a GABesque phrase.
"Delicious dead babies"
By: Dropkick Brody
Donkey Call
Definition: Anonymous telephone call in which the caller screams "DONKEY" at the
top of his/her lungs when the recipient picks up the phone. Alternatively, a
telephone call from The Rockin' Donkey.
By: The Rockin' Donkey
doobs
Definition: Dude Boobs
By: newwave
doorknob
Definition: n: something gays put inside of their butt holes. (Actually refers
to an incident with Trixxie which has since been removed from here).
By: Chi-Chi
Felipe
Douchebaggery
Definition: The act of being a douchebag.
"Ford's incessant douchebaggery began to annoy even the most jaded of
GABbers."
By: Phuc
douchenozzle
Definition: n. an irritating and moronic person, especially one who deserves to
be kicked in the balls.
By: Erika
E
Emoticon
Definition: GAB suicide. If you're happy then say so, these little buggers just
attract and prolong the bashings.
":-) =-O :-$ :-\ :-( :-* :-! :'( ;-) >:o :-[ :-X :-P 8-) O:-) :-D etc..."
By: Dropkick Brody
End.In.Tears.
Definition: Originating from a quote by Eddie, the ship's computer in chapter 19
of The Hitchhiker's Guide To
the Galaxy, where he says "It'll all end in tears, I know it!" It is meant as
a prediction that a thread topic will result in hurt feelings, mass hysteria, or
a sniper in a clock tower. (Originally by: Dead Robot)
By: Straw
Evar
Definition: Ever. Often used for added emphasis, and occasionally used
sarcastically.
"Funniest. Thread. EVAR!"
By: Whistler P. McManus
F
Fag
Definition: n. A male human who shows characteristics of a human female. Usually
preceded by about 50 columns of a lack of text.
"Gotta tell ya, I love the new curtains my huge-breasted wife put up over the
weekend." Other GABber: "Fag."
By: Phuc
Fagjack
Definition: To twist the topic of a thread around to homosexuality or
homosexuals, or the homosexual viewpoint.
"Damn it, Declan, we're only ten posts into this thread and already you've
fagjacked it!"
By: Whistler P. McManus
Fap
Definition: Onomatopoeia referring to the average male GABber's frequent
masturbatory activity.
"I shot a
baby in the face - fapfapfapfapfapfap"
By: Mailman
Fat Daughter
Definition: To call bullshit or express disbelief, especially if suspicious of a
prank. Based on the infamous capcon of Chris Garret's fictional obese
daughter.
By: PuggyD
FDISK
Definition: The answer to every computer-related question asked on GAB. (A
program used to erase the contents of a computer hard drive).
By: Mailman
Feh
Definition: Meh. Bah. Yiddish interjection used to express disdain that borders
on apathy.
"Nu? You hear our Irving is seeing a shicksa?"
"Feh."
By: Phuc
Fife
Definition: An archaic and obsolete member of the flute family. Once used
for signaling troops in battle, it is, in the present day, relegated to use by
historic music buffs and other sorts of dorks. Practitioners of the fife are
often accused of being "fags," due to the phallic nature of the object.
By: Whistler P. McManus
FIRST TO POST!
Definition:
Usually the first post made after an article. However, the second and third post
can also be this if GABbers are particularly slow. It is treated as spam on many message boards.
By: Dropkick Brody and Roofie Raccoon
Flaptard
Definition: A now archaic GABber insult based on a swearbot substitution for "fucktard."
By: Whistler
For ChiChi
Definition: Best. Kake-haunting thread. Evar. A thread about something that had
already been posted that Kake asked us to let die. We did no such thing.
By: Dropkick Brody
Ford (Prefect)
Definition: A popular former Gabber known for being opinionated and
confrontational. His legend persists due to the unfounded rumor that he
was banned.
"Ford was banned?"
By: Livewire
Frost
Definition: n. A swearbot euphemism for "fuck."
By: Napkin
Fugly
Definition: A winning combo of the words fat and ugly. (Also fucking and
ugly)
By: Dropkick Brody and Millie
G
GAB
Definition: v. a way to fill the boring gap between 9 am and 5 pm without having
to get anything done.
By: Chi-Chi
Felipe
GABboston a.k.a. ZUG's
Ten Year Anniversary
Definition: A big party. But it's not "GABboston". "It's
the ZUG anniversary. GAB is a part of ZUG, merely a section. ZUG has been around
for ten years and has encompassed many mediums and shit."
By: Phuc
GabGathering
Definition: a get together where members of the community actually meet each
other at a pre-determined location. Usually involves intoxication, flashing of
body parts, webcamming and some sort of group activity which prompts a call to
the local police department.
Slogan: "What happens at GAB - - - , stays at GAB - - - " i.e. GABlanta,
GABboston, GABhouston, GABassee
By: Trae
Gab Suggestion Box
Definition:
hahahahaha etc. (see "recycle bin")
By: Chickens
Gentle Snowflake
Definition: The preferred GAB euphemism for a window licking 'tard. (Originally
by: Fratberry)
By: Whistler P. McManus
"Go
eat a bowl of dick"
Definition: Hammerhead used this a lot. It's pretty self explanatory. Well,
would you ask someone you LIKED to eat a bowl of dick? It was originally used by
Manny Fever.
By: Dropkick Brody
Gromulon
Definition: A hideous, ill-conceived monster from beyond the moon, bent on
consuming friends and enemies alike. Possessing little care for English syntax
and few goals beyond gorging, it is often lonely.
By: Mr. Glass
(What?)
GVG "Girl Virgins of
Gab"
Definition: A group of young, still impressionable girls that have been left
dateless, broken hearted and sadly, also with fully intact hymens. Often lusted
after by the men of Gab (and some women), you do not have to be female to a GVG.
If male, but gay you may also join. All members carry V-Cards, or Virgin Cards.
By: This High Priestess of Stewie
H
Hargrave,
Jeff
Definition: John's evil twin brother, the true power behind GAB. (Actually
derived from a newspaper article that wrote John's name incorrectly as Jeff).
By: Chickens
"Hello dear, are
you new?"
Definition: Originated by Daggy, a phrase meant to blow the whistle on a n00b.
Hilarity ensues.
By: default_user
Hilarity ensues!
Definition: when something really funny can or will happen. Sometimes
used in a sarcastic manner. Most of the time, hilarity does not ensue for
at least one person.
By: Trae
HOB
Definition: The House of Bugs. A similar web site to ZUG, with some exceptions.
While there seems to be a sort of rivalry, many users have accounts on both ZUG
and HOB. "Take it to HOB"
is used primarily to try to dissuade political threads.
HOB was started by codeslave after a private feud with Hargrave.
By: Whistler P. McManus
Hoggin'
Definition: Coined by Trae, it's basically a fat or ugly person (who you usually
wouldn't touch with a ten foot barge pole) who you fooled around with when you
were desperate/drunk.
By: Dropkick Brody
I
"I'd
hit that"
Definition I would like to have carnal relations with that. Used primarily for
shock value.
"Look, a dead baby! I'd hit that."
By: Dropkick Brody
"I
Like Cheese"
Definition: Generic response to any controversial topic.
By: The Rockin' Donkey
Imp/Impersonate
Definition: v. 1) to create and post as a secret alias on GAB. Susie McMuffin
was merely an instance of Chris Garrett imping, much to the dismay the the male
GABbers. 2) to hack into another GABber's account and falsely post as them.
"Bob Johnson is a master at imping, as he has successfully impersonated both
Trae and Jeff."
By: Erika
Irony
Definition: Like, when you have this sort of, like, thing between what you
EXPECT is gonna happen and, like what then actually DOES happen an' shit.
By: Phuc
"It's a trap!"
Definition: Based on the quote by Admiral Ackbar in Return of the Jedi.
Can be used to warn you when someone is trying to lure you in. If intended
for a noob, may also be accompanied by this link (http://www.itsatrap.net/)
By: Straw
"I've seen bigger"
Definition: Generic response to ANY post regarding the size of anything. Stems
from it's first use
here.
By: Dropkick Brody
J
Jeff Hargrave
Definition: (see "John Hargrave")
By: Napkin
John Hargrave
Definition: (see "Jeff Hargrave")
By: Napkin
K
"Killed the
funny"
Definition: A more or less accurate description of someone or something that
is making GAB less funny than it used to be.
By: Professor
Nutbutter
L
Leet (or L337)
Definition: Impossibly stupid AOL speak meaning elite. It makes the baby Jesus
cry when someone writes it.
By: Dropkick Brody
Lemonparty
Definition: A site to which we send users who don't seem right for Gab, yet are
just smart enough not to fall for Tubgirl. The website features three elderly
gentlemen involved in a sort of
ménage à trois.
By: Livewire
Less
than three
Definition: Comes from the phrase "I <3 you", which means, I "less
than three" (<3) you.
By: LunchBoxxx
Lurk
Definition: v. to read GAB
in order to get a feel for it, and avoid getting hazed, berated, and otherwise
hated when you begin to post.
By: Erika
Lurker
Definition: 1. n. someone who reads GAB and gives out clickies, but does not
post.
2. n. Someone
who is not yet a noob.
(see "lurk")
By: Erika and Mailman
M
Maha (from the old rating system,
now obsolete)
Definition: Named after the infamous Maharishi, whose command of teh funny was
about as great as GW Bush's command of second-grade English, the Maha is a way
of expressing that a post on the message board is either unfunny or boring. It
is to click the unhappy face next to a post, indicating one's dislike of the
post's content. Generally considered rude because it leaves the user with fewer
funny points which as we all know can be cashed in for valuable prizes.
By: Phuc and
Livewire
Makes the Baby Jesus
Cry
Definition: Something that is so sad that the Baby Jesus would actually shed a
tear.
"When Trae doesn't show her breasts to the Gabbers it makes the Baby Jesus
cry"
By: Aimless
Meat Curtains
Definition: (See: "Beef Flaps")
By: Oliver Chest
Meh
Definition: An expression of indifference.
"Holy shit! That is one huge ______ !" "Meh, I've seen bigger."
By: Whistler P. McManus
Mufftaur
Definition: The name of the protagonist of a parody written by Demo Monkey.
Based on the infamous Chris Garrett.
By: Lager Trout
N
n00b, newb,
nube, newbie, noob, etc.
Definition: n. a person who has just began to post on GAB. Bad spelling, poor
grammar, and a general lack of coherency and wit are typical characteristics.
UsUaLLY spelZ l1k3 this lol!.
By: Erika
Napkinize
Definition: To make something wicked sweet, like a GABtionary.
By: Chi-Chi
Felipe
Negaclick
Definition: (See "Maha")
By: Livewire
NSFW (Not Safe For
Work)
Definition: Acronym used next to a link, informing the reader that the link
leads to offensive material, such as porn or a portrait of Janet Reno. The
acronym is sometimes replaced by the symbol >O<.
By: Mailman
O
OH. COME. ON.
Definition: Phrase that communicates absolute disbelief at the previous poster's
comment. Made infamous by our beloved Dead Robot.
By: Chickens
Orbs of Hilarity
Definition = The smiley faces that appear next to each post and indicate its
funny rating. The orbs of hilarity have replaced the "pee tubes" in September
2005, with the version 5.0 of GAB.
By: Mailman
Otto
Definition:
The happy face
rating button. Named after Evil Otto, the bouncing happy face in the video
game Berzerk, whose job is to come and kill you if you stay in a room too long.
(See "clickie")
By: Livewire
P
Parody Thread
Definition: n. The instance of using the words in a thread to make a
duplicate thread about a different subject. (eg "Parody Thread" and "Parroty
Thread")
By: Trae
Pee Tube
Definition: The rectangle between the smiley face and the sad face that has
sections of it turn yellow in response to clickies that are given. "Peeing" in
someone's "tube" refers to giving them clickies. (Editor's Note:
Replaced by the Orbs of Hilarity as of September 2005)
By: Napkin
Penguin
Definition: The coolest fucking thing on the entire planet.
By: Oliver Chest
Penii
Definition: Plural for "penis."
By: Everyone's Grudge
Phla Talk
Definition:In a confusing aspect speak, if grammatical, dictionary and the
references are used, which are not understandable from humans of the ears.
By: Phuc
Poop
Definition: What to talk about when all other topics have been exhausted.
By: Napkin
Poop Canoe
Definition: A gift, usually given to an ex- or soon to be ex-lover. It is made
by holding a log of one's own excrement horizontally in one hand and using the
index finger of the other hand to carve a trench lengthwise into the upper side
of the excrement. The carving should be done in the presence of the
recipient. Upon completion, it should be presented with an exclamation of
"Poop Canoe!" (Originally
by the late
Manhattan Fever, aka Manny)
By: Whistler P. McManus
Pram it Up
Definition: To take the humor out of a thread or to change the overall tone of the thread so that it is much
stupider than it was before. "Thanks for bringing your Carrot Top quotes into my thread. Now you done gone and
Prammed it all up!"
By: Phuc
Profit
Definition: Usually the end of a plan.
Originally refers to the South Park
episode "Gnomes" where the underpants gnomes explain their corporate plan: 1)
Steal underwear. 2) ? 3) Profit!
1. Drug the Girl. 2. Put her in your trunk. 3. Profit!
By: Dropkick Brody (Addition by Roofie Racoon)
Q
QTA
Definition: Queer Team Alpha. GAB's gang of dykes and fairies, known for their
superpowers.
By: Whistler P. McManus
R
"release a slave"
"release the doves"
Definition: To take a shit.
By: BIG and Trae
Ruining GAB
Definition: Expression which signifies that something is unfunny and frequent
enough to cause a substantial decline in GAB's entertainment value.
By: ClintMcPants
S
Sassy Goat
Definition: (see: "Brad Nails")
By: Chickens
Scatagorical
Definition: adj. being totally full of shit.
By: Trae
Second Post
Definition: Coveted spot in a thread, due to it's ability to garner all teh
clicks.
By: Dropkick Brody
Server Error
Definition: A regular GAB occurrence. However, it wouldn't be GAB without it.
Also the source of many a 'going down' joke.
By: Dropkick Brody
SFW (Safe For Work)
Definition: Acronym used next to a link, informing the reader that the link
leads to nothing graphically offensive. The acronym SFW is sometimes replaced by
the symbol >*<.
By: Mailman
Skeet
Definition: Follows a successful series of faps. (see "fap")
By: Phuc
Soccer-Mommed
Definition: v. To give one-orb. "...in little league everyone gets a trophy. Soccer-Mom type logic so nobody gets hurt feelings."
By: No_Key_Bandit
Sofa King Wee Todd Did
Definition: Sound it out. If you still don't get it then you are definitely sofa
king wee todd did.
By: Dropkick Brody
So long to Red Dye #2
Definition: a phrase started by Dead Robot in response to... well, we
don't know just yet, but he used it a hell of a lot.
By: Trae
Spork
Definition: A sexy cutlery used by Neep.
By: Chance
Stage 5
Definition: A joke which is long... long past it's sell by date. Doesn't even
garner pity clicks.
By: Dropkick Brody
Steve
Definition: A man found in Boston by repeatedly shouting his name out bus
windows at random males.
By: Whistler P. McManus
Stevens, Jay
Definition: Creator of The Least Effective Search Engine Ever. Actually, Jay
took over coding ZUG, after codeslave left.
By: Professor Nutbutter
STFU
Definition: "Shut the Fuck Up" - n00bs and retards are often encouraged to do
so. Often use in conjunction with SUYT if the offending party is female, as in
"SUYT or STFU."
By: Whistler P. McManus
The Store (or "ZUG
Store")
Definition: An attempt at gaining revenue and spreading brand identity. Failed
miserably due to lack of commitment on the part of the proprietor and primary
artist, and leaving the keys with the kid with the rusty zipper and yellow
sneakers.
By: Phuc
Suicide
Definition: 1) starts with S... 2) down the block, not across the street 3) use a
razor play the wrist violin.
By: UnderWhere?
SUPPLIES!
Definition: The Engrish version of "SUPPRISE!" (Comes from
this joke)
By: Lloyd
SUYT
Definition: A way of welcoming a new female to the gab population,
à la "Show Us Your Tits". Works most of the time.
By: Professor
Nutbutter
T
teh
Definition: A deliberate misspelling of "the", which has grown from the constant
accidental misspelling of said word.
By: Napkin and Sombrero
Toosh
Definition: An ignorant way of pronouncing Touché, in hopes that some
pretentious douchebag will correct you on it.
By: Sombrero
Tuna Can Penis
Definition: a penis that is two inches long but 6 inches in circumference
By: Trixxie
tubgirl
Definition: A great weapon in today's war on nubes. It is a lovely photograph of
a beautiful Japanese woman, who is resting in a bathtub. She is, in fact, nude.
However, her vagina is pixilated out, you perverts. She has on a yellow mask, so
as to conceal her face, and a pair of white rubber knee high shoe thingies. Oh,
and she's also shooting projectile diarrhea about three feet into the air, onto
her face.
By: Napkin
Twatwaffle
Definition: The post-Zug10 insult of choice.
By: Whistler
U
No entries yet.
V
Vlaccid
Definition: GAB's most successful band to date. They are touring in South
America through the summer of 2007.
By: Piquantrax
W
Wheel of Ipecac
Definition: (we-ul uv ip-i'-kak) n. 1. Everyone's favorite computer game show!
Hosted by John Hargrave and Jay Stevens. Sadly, only two episodes aired
before its demise. (Episode 1
here)
By: No_Key_Bandit
whorbing
Definition: the act of whoring for orbs of hilarity, usually by posting clichéd
responses and flirting. Similar to the "old-age" practice of "clickie whoring"
By: Erika
Whore
Definition: pet name for someone who really loves to love a lot. A LOT.
By: Trae
Woosh!
Definition: The sound of a joke doing MACH-5 over one's head. Standard reply to
someone who obviously did not get the joke.
By: Mailman
X
X
Definition: X is for X, motherfuckers!
By: Mr. Sir
Y
No entries yet.
Z
Zanzibar
Definition: Invented by Squeamish. A word inserted into a thread that
theoretically makes the thread easy to recall via search. For example, if
a single mother claims her babydaddy will stick around forever, the word
'zanzibar' in the thread will make it easy to find six months later when the
babydaddy skips town. Zanzibaring a thread has become less effective due
to the number of single mothers and the fact that the search engine is useless.
By: Professor
Nutbutter
Zug
Definition: n. The World's Only Comedy Site.
By: Briham
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