Here's what I learned: there are no shortage of creams and potions out there that will supposedly put your love life in overdrive. But what most of us need is a cream called SELF-CONFIDENCE. This would be a salve, with the consistency of Vaseline, that we could smear on our face and neck to help us through the fear of rejection. Then we could boldly approach potential lovers and confidently ask them for a date. Unfortunately, our faces would be covered with a shiny layer of unctious goo, and they would turn and flee. But at least we wouldn't take it so personally.
Of all the aphrodisiacs I tried, the only one that worked for me was the "aphrodisiac dinner," and here's why: you're thinking about sex the entire meal. You're putting lots of genital-looking things in your mouths, you both know what's going on. It's subtle, but it's obvious. It's very exciting. You've got to try it. But maybe that's just the Spanish fly talking.
My aphrodisiac experiment made me realize something: romance is a lot of hard work. Isn't there anything for the lazy lover, the guy or gal that just wants to get up and go? Fortunately, there is. It's called masturbation.
Just remember: your hand will never reject you.
If you enjoyed The Aphrodisiac Prank, you might also enjoy The Penis Prank, in which John attempts to increase the size of his Johnson.
