Only the "old-timers" still argue about whether IBM PC's or Macintoshes are better, since they're practically the same machine nowadays. Such outdated "computer tribalism" is quaint and endearing, when the truth is that we're all one digital world, watched over by the all-knowing, unblinking eye of Bill.

I thought it would be warmly reminiscent, though, to compare the technical support of the Apple and IBM web sites. I used the tried-and-true method of making up a fake technical term and seeing if they admitted ignorance or tried to bluff their way through.

You tell me who won this one.

Subj: Question
Date: 95-08-28 13:38:06 EDT
From: Baked Ham
To: webmaster@apple.com
CC: Baked Ham

I was thinking of buying a Macintosh, but I'm unaware of whether you currently support real-time 64-bit QDWI. Now, I'm skeptical as to whether you could even achieve reasonable rates on a SparcStation, but your web site seems to point to fully-enhanced QDWI modifications with a little hardware tweaking.

Alternately, if you could point me to any computer vendors that you think would offer QDWI compatability, I would greatly appreciate it. I might still buy a Macintosh, as I'd really like to get hooked up with America Online.

Thanks!
John Myers Hargrave

Subj: Re: Question
Date: 95-08-28 13:51:48 EDT
From: dcm@taurus.apple.com
CC: webmaster@apple.com

You've got me. QDWI stands for ??? (Of course, if I don't know that, I probably don't know the answer to your question; however, I may be able to find out)

Dale C. Mead
Information Analyst
Corporate Library e-mail: dcm@apple.com
Apple Computer, Inc. desktop: dcm@taurus.apple.com

Subj: Question
Date: 95-08-29 09:16:08 EDT
From: Baked Ham
To: askibm@info.ibm.com
CC: Baked Ham

I was thinking of buying an IBM PC (personally, I think a clone is just that - a clone!), but I'm unaware of whether you currently support real-time 64-bit QDWI. Now, I'm skeptical as to whether you could even achieve reasonable rates on a SparcStation, but your web site seems to point to fully-enhanced QDWI modifications with a little hardware tweaking.

Alternately, if you could point me to any computer vendors that you think would offer QDWI compatability, I would greatly appreciate it. I might still buy an IBM, as I'd really like to get hooked up with America Online.

Thanks!
John Myers Hargrave

Subj: No Subject
Date: 95-08-29 12:26:09 EDT
From: askibm@VNET.IBM.COM

CALLOWN INTERNET RESPONSE FACILITY

Hello John, Please call Dealer Locator at 1-800-772-2227 for authorized IBM dealers in your area.

Thank You for using askIBM..........
Roseann

(askibm@vnet.ibm.com)
IBM Information Support Center
P.O. Box 22590
Tucson, AZ
1-800-IBM-3333

Internet Log Number: 19829