Home of Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys, and *NSYNC
JH: I just got some Britney Spears MP3s from the Internet, and one of my friends said you guys are going to sue everyone who downloads MP3s. Can I send you some money for this music?
JIVE RECORDS: Um ... it depends on what service you're using. Um ... are you paying for the downloads?
JH: No, I stole them illegally.
JIVE: [laughs] Well, how much do you think we should charge?
JH: That's what I'm hoping you can tell me. I have a blank check right here, and I can make it out to you, or Britney, or whoever. Just tell me how much.
JIVE: Um ... this is the first phone call I've had like this.
JH: I could also do a money order.
JIVE: I'm going to need to take your name and number, and I'll call you back.
JH: I'd do that, but I'm afraid you will use it to incriminate me in a court of law.
JIVE: Okay, well, why don't you call me back in an hour, and I'll see if I can find someone else who can help you.
JH: Sounds good. Talk to you then.
A follow-up call to Jive Records an hour later was not answered. I thought this proved once and for all that the music industry really is on the verge of bankruptcy -- they can't even afford to answer their own phones.
